Archives---August, 2004
...How great is this?...the only thing the junior Senator from France has to hang his hat on is Vietnam, given that the most liberal voting record in the Senate won't cut it. Now come the other Vets who completely contradict (in a sworn affidavit) the whole Kerry rescue deal. But I reckon it really doesn't matter. The last Democrat in the White House was most dishonest, disingenuous and corrupt president of my lifetime (yes, that includes Tricky Dick) and it didn't seem to bother the sage voters of this country---TWICE! Still scouring ebay in an effort to find a party that has some grasp of the Constitution without being isolationist nuts, as are so many of my former comrades in the Libertarian Party.
...Fay Wray dead at 96, and I didn't even know she was sick.
...Joe Gibbs makes a triumphant return in last night's Hall of Fame game. Skins Win! Should make for an interesting year as my Washington boys battle with the Tuna and his boy Quincy. Oops, scratch that. Make it the Tuna/asshole extraordinaire and his boy. em, errrr, well, let me get back to you on that. South America's team may have some problems. Couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of guys. Did I mention the Cowboys cannot suck enough?
...Trump's casinos go Chapter 11. Can't say I'm, surprised. I told him not to hit that 12 with the house showing a six.
...All pics posted!
While not being declared a done deal, most all pics and accounts of the 
are up and they're good! Help yourself to our fabo trip.
...The tunes will be blasting forth this time next Saturday on Randall's Island in NYC, and yes, your roving reporter will be on hand to give the blow by blow accounts. The show will be great, but the grand stories will more than likely emanate from the post gig gathering on the lower east side at Manitoba's. I have no expectations of celebrity elbow rubbing, but wouldn't be surprised to get to say hi to Iggy, Johnny Ramone, Bo Diddly, et al at the aforementioned "party." And, yes, David Johansen is appearing with the reunited (not the dead ones) New York Dolls. Scarry.
...Quick shout out to Matt Bruner. He joined the Waring dinner Wednesday night in Cobb. Brother Bill and I have nailed down the Haj next weekend, you are welcome to join us making you a shoe in for Hillbilly Dictators Jihad membership, given you could recite much of Stand Tall, including nailing the "American Good-Good Girls" line (most would omit the second good). Great to see you again my friend; do stay in touch as you and your bride affect your relocation to the Lone Star state.
...Just because I'm a hell of a guy, at no cost to you, I will gladly provide the Suttle Bitch Slap your Lawyer Kit. Email for details.
...They said it couldn't be done. Hell, I
said it couldn't be done, but do it we will. Haj Impossible is on---Little
Steven's Underground Garage Festival, Saturday, August 14 on Randall's
Island in NYC. A harmonic conversion of nagging from the north, combined
with slaving at the computer for deals and an unbelievably supportive bride
means there will be a Haj in 2004. I shall Stand Tall with brothers Bill, Rob,
Sal and others to catch Bo Diddly, Nancy Sinatra, Iggy with the Stooges and of
course, the world's greatest rock and roll band, The Dictators. 35 bands
11am - 11 pm, with the headliners beginning around 4:00. Big Star sealed
the deal with Bill. And of course we'll be obliged to attend the post gig
party at Manitoba's. Its a tremendous onus, but we're up to the
challenge. See the 
page for more info.
...And just to prove I'm not completely myopic about the my own idiotic activates, I give you my increasing despair about the lack of the lack of choice regarding who will lead this nation over the next several years. Yeah, in all times, all folks think that the sky is falling, and that next generation..., but, again, I ask, you with over 100 million folks eligible to hold the office of President, can't we at least find one guy or gal with the sense God gave an avocado to run? The junior Senator from France v. an administration that more and more appears to be as closed as Tiger's entourage. Thomas Sowell, Walter Williams, where art thou? Can we wake up Jefferson? Hell, I'd take George Jefferson at this point.
...This catch up thing is proving more taxing than the most enjoyable 1986 mile 2004 Summer Fun Extravaganza. Nephew Ridge comes to visit today and our brother from the great white north, Paul Waring, makes a cameo appearance this afternoon at he newly acquired Casa Moke. In addition there is a back burner issue of tremendous gravity, that I dare not mention at present for fear of scarring the kids and women folk. Pics have been sorted. May be available later today, if not tomorrow. Courage!
...Ok, so I'm still busy sorting through pics and trying to catch up with the real world. Sue me! No genius takes this morning, just re-assurances that every effort is being made to expedite the greatly anticipated 2004 Summer Fun Extravaganza pics and narrative. Check out some other parts you never get around to. Links are really cool. Read a book---just calm down and I'll be up to speed in no time.
...The first business day of August begins, necessitating a rather hectic schedule to play catch up with the real world. Consequently, those of you frothing at the mouth for more pics and accounts of the 2004 Summer Fun Extravaganza will just have to be patient. Work is in progress, but there are over 500 pics and some video to go through. I beg your patience in this matter, with the caveat that it is unlike other promised works in progress that never seem to get done (see non-revamped Hillbilly Dictators Jihad page). Also am aware that some links are broken at present. Again I ask your indulgence as Suttle World undergoes a tune up in the next several weeks.
...Not sure what to make of the elevated terror threat level at particular locations, most notably Wall Street. This could well be the beginning of tighter security for the Republican convention/infomercial that begins August 30 (does anybody else remember a convention that ran into September?). This too will require time to digest/listen to others to tell me what to think about the matter.
...August begins and Suttle World returns from the 2004 Summer Fun Extravaganza. 9 days. 1987 miles. Home team won all six games attended. Though my fee is a bit pricey and I insist on first class travel and accommodations, I can be retained if you're home team is in a must win situation by attending the event. Email for details. 9 days and 500 pics are a bit overwhelming for the first morning back, so let's just say a great time was had by all. Congratulations to Cliff Matthews, the 2004 Professional Putters Association National Champion. Thanks so much to our gracious hosts and those here who kept the home fires burning. Lot's o pics and details to come. But as I wade through all the depictions and accounts of the trip (which you cannot use without the express written consent of the Commissioner of Suttle World), I'll toss you a couple of bones in the way of a few pics here.
August 28, 2004
...A familial medical emergency gives you folks the day off. Niece Jessica was involved in a failry serious one vehicle accident yesterday morning on I-16. The bad news is she's hospitalized and will be for the next several days. The good news is she's in a hell of a lot better shape than what used to be a Honda Passport. It was a rollover deal, leaving yours truly slack jawed at the vehicle's condition after locating same at a Macon tow lot to retrieve her belongings. At present, Jessica is in the good care of the Medical Center of Macon. Pics and details to follow. In the meantime, take a little time to surf the site and catch those parts you haven't gotten around to yet.
August 27, 2004
...An anti-histamine induced coma would appear to be what the lay doctor ordered. Sleep? Who needs sleep? All you do is lay still in a dark room and do nothing. Still every couple months or so Suttle undergoes mini-hibernation therapy and yesterday's 18 hours or so of snoozing appear to have aided greatly in affecting recovery from this hideous contagion that has infested Stately Roberts/Suttle Manor.
...Let's all do the youngin' Hokey Poky...you put the niece right in; you put the nephew out; you grab em round the neck and swing em all about...Collegian Jessica makes a brief stop in Tucker as she mixes in studies at Georgia Southern with her world tour---en route, this time, to Kansas City if I'm not mistaken while Ridge returns to Calhoun to visit family for the weekend. The bottom line of all this humanoid rearrangement may mean a weekend free for the bride and I to have some special time to sniffle, sneeze and hack with one another. The other moral of the story, at least from Jessica's perspective, is make friends based on character and whether or not their dad has been sitting in the left seat for Delta for many moons. Air travel can be trying these days, but seemingly worth the effort when the one gets a really good fare---as in free. Now if I can just figure out a way to have them adopt me.
...While in the Ridge department, we continue to be incredibly impressed by the staff at the newly opened Tucker Middle School. Ridge's enrollment could not have been more seamless, despite the long story of whys and wherefores of his living with us. A request to meet with the counseling department and his teachers to get a feel for where we all stand academically this year was met with a date set for said meeting next week within 24 hours of my emailed request to the school's head counselor. In addition, Ridge was schlepping 30 pounds (literally) of gear back and forth each day for lack of a locker. Yolanda left a voice mail with the principal's office Tuesday morning. Three returned calls and two hours later Ridge had his locker along with needless apologies from staff that he had a problem to begin with. While DeKalb County is considered to be among the state's best school systems, this is service with a smile that one doesn't expect from a government school of any sort.
Only three days until the Olympics go away!!!! Yeah its still an incredibly tedious exercise for the most part (damn, I'm funny), but Greece would have appeared to pull this off with great success. My bad; and gladly so. I was the one predicting these games would be a cluster fornication---which begs the question of this Greco-Roman thing again.
...The folks in midtown know little about the screening of the Ramones rockumentary: End of the Century. They're part of a national chain, so I'm not surprised that I knew as much as they did about the film, given the announcement of screening dates was made 48 hours ago. Details about the screening and caravan to attend to follow.
...This may work better than my cruise missile suggestion----Iraqi's marching on the Imam Ali Shrine with metaphorical pitchforks and torches to force out the infidels. Just imagine thousands of Shiites walking up to the mosque and singing a bar of Alice's Restaurant...
...Rut ro...Russian authorities are now confirming traces of explosives on one of the two planes that went down within an hour of one another earlier this week. Perhaps what we have here is a simple failure to communicate. What the radical Muslims need is religious zealotry 101---where one learns the decorum of God nuts: knock on doors to hand out literature, preach on street corners, etc...not blow things up! The Jehovah Witness folks could teach these guys a thing or two about how to do it right. And the gentle surfer is reminded that even these annoyances can be overcome by merely drawing the chalk outline of a body on your front porch---works everytime.
August 26, 2004
...Though not quite as grueling as two-a-days, DUFFLE mini-camp went off well last night---the most encouraging item being that we should be able to field 10 teams. Otherwise, most everything falls into the SOS department.
...Geez Max (Cleland), what happened? While we may not have seen eye to eye on policy, you've never played the pathetic card before. But there he was yesterday rolling up on Crawford, TX to deliver a letter to the President that in part says any attack against one veteran is an attack against all vets. Excuse me, but didn't Senator Kerry testify before Congress about the evil baby killing, "veins in their teeth" Americans in Vietnam? Most disappointing; and, again can anyone give me one reason to vote for Senator Kerry except that doing so means not voting for President Bush? If not, then the advantage of presumption favors the status-quo at least in argumentative theory. And while we're at it---all this talk of 527's and such. Here's a radical idea. How about letting folks spend their own money to express their political leanings in the manner in which they chose? Despite that being the founder's intent with the free speech clause of the First Amendment, I keep forgetting that we abandoned that document some time ago, eschewing the Constitution for the Andy Hardy/Judy Garland "let's put on a show"/make it up as you go form of government we now enjoy.
...Not exactly a $37 suitcase deal, but word comes from Vermont via Atlanta that a Phoenix Rising live at the Big Dipper tape has been rediscovered. Obviously, the box set will now have to be remastered.
...Also from the inbox----commiserations from across the continent regarding unsavory treks to catch a Tators gig. The most common being related to the Honeymoon Haj last December during a blizzard. I distinctly remember being TOLD by meteorologist Manitoba at Manitoba's there wasn't gonna be any freakin' storm. 18 inches of horizontal snowfall later...
...More show biz news---The Ramones recently released rockumentary End of the Century will have an Atlanta showing October 15 at the Midtown Art Cinema 8. Details to follow (hoping there's a matinee). Also from Gabba Gabba Heyville comes news that the other Ramones rockumentary Raw is set for release on DVD September 28. More details at ramones.com. Given Ramones paraphernalia takes up more wall space than Dictators stuff at Hillbilly Dictators Jihad World Headquarters, me thinks yours truly will be in line for both events. The irony is that the movie ticket will cost more than any of the five times I saw the band live and in person.
...Greco-Roman wrestling. Think the name says it much better than any take I could master. For God's sake please just end this Olympic thing---I'll even watch the closing ceremonies if it will speed things up a bit.
...Down goes Morganton! Alas, our heroes from North Carolina ran into a buzz saw in the form of the Texas team last night in the semi-final round of the Little League World Series. City Hall opens at 8:00 and soon thereafter I shall be on the phone to find out when the parade will be held. Details to follow. For now, local coverage of the team's travails can be found in the Morganton News Herald
...Very short takes today as the lovely creeping crud Yolanda has battled for the past two weeks has now fully infested your humble web master's precious bodily fluids. Good news is that we're having a hell of a sale on phlegm. "OVERSTOCKED!!!---WE MUST BE CRAZY! SNOT AT BELOW DEALER COST!" Dealer retains all rebates. Not all applicants will qualify. Your mileage may vary. GI Joe sold separately.
August 25, 2004
...Props to my father's alma mater, the University of North Carolina, which placed fifth in the most expensive public colleges in the country. The Tar Heels come in at $22,000+/year. This was a quick glance at the tube piece of info gleaned yesterday, so I will assume it is for out of state tuition and includes room and board. UVa was third and I don't recall the big winner. Harvard, where the average grade given (literally) is an A, is still the mack daddy of all schools, coming in just over 40 grand/year. This leads to a not so interesting idea for some academic research/more work for grad students while tenured faculty does whatever they do---mainly tell grad students which of their classes to teach and when. Control for the usual variables and get two groups of eighteen year olds. Send one group to Harvard and give the other a $10,000 beer voucher. Check back in twenty years and see how everyone's doing. Speaking of higher edumacation...word from across the street indicates that Clay is finding the first month at the Citadel to be like, well, the first month at the Citadel. Sorta fits into the walk around with a rock in your shoe all day so it will feel good when you take it out department.
...Before we depart North Carolina, let the record show that the Little League team from Morganton has advanced out of their pool and will play in the U.S. semi-final game tonight against Richmond, TX---8:00 on ESPN. Go blue (Carolina blue, of course---as opposed to pencil necked geek navy blue).
...Are you ready for some football?!! Are you ready for Hank Williams, Jr. to join his father? Regardless, DUFFLE mini-camp opens this evening with the obligatory pre season meeting to decide that we'll do it the same way as the past two seasons. My guess is that we're still going to need a couple more owners. Email to claim your team.
...I too immediately suspected foul play when learning of the two Russian plane crashes within an hour of one another yesterday, but "upon further review" the stories I've heard about Aeroflot, that limits two carry on goats and one case of vodka per passenger,...
...Memo to Neil Cavuto: if you're going to thieve my takes, at least give me some attribution. He didn't suggest the cruise missile route, but did allow that the Mosque in question has already been defiled by the current occupants, ergo, its fair ground for opening a tall boy can of whoop ass on its resident towel heads. From my limited experience, buildings are a bit easier to reconstruct than Marines. He even used the Vatican City metaphor, for God's sake (so to speak)! I do like the guy, and though I don't have MS, I do have a bum leg and could put together a couple hundred pages about nice people doing nice things. Reckon the reason his book sold so well is because he and his colleagues devote the vast majority of their time telling us about bad guys doing bad things?
August 23, 2004
...Is Waffle House hiring? Good a place as any to start I reckon. Having come to terms with the fact that my leg is as good as its gonna get combined with a lack of enthusiasm over an eleventh trip through the OR = get back to it, especially now that all the legalities/administrative stuff has been dealt with. Got a job? Email your humble web dude. Place kicker and ditch digger are pretty much out of the question (I'm right footed), otherwise all takers are welcome.
...Memo to IRS: 1) Bite me. 2) The extension of the extension of the extension we've filed does in fact run through 2017. We don't owe you guys anything. Its just that all the 8 x 10 color glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each...keeps getting moved to the bottom of the pile. Fairtax.org is where its at baby! The speaker (you remember Dennis Hastert, third in line for the presidency) is behind it as is John Linder of GA and a gaggle of other House members, so maybe between $180 billion agriculture bills and funding the Lawrence Welk Museum you nice folks on the Hill can get the national retail sales tax passed and repeal the 16th amendment. Brokaw almost got it right, but the title of the book should have been The Greatest Generation*. *---$8-10 trillion in unfunded debt courtesy of Social Security, Medicare and various other misguided notions of the "Great Society." Atlas is going to shrug friends, though I doubt I'll be around to see it. Meanwhile, from one of his wife's $500 million homes, Senator Kerry continues to promise bigger tax breaks for folks who don't pay taxes. Makes sense to me.
...There's no problem with this standoff at the Mosque in Iraq that a cruise missile can't solve. Yes, I respect that it is sacred ground, but our reasonable brothers and sisters of Islam are surely of the mind that this towel head/Muqtada al-Sadr has defiled the place already, and the radical element of the "faith" can't hate us any more than they already do. Same goes, theoretically, for The Vatican or any other holy shrine of your choice, excepting, of course, Hillbilly Dictators Jihad World Headquarters and CBGBs.
...Thanks to Karen for her very flattering prominent link to the Haj Impossible/Abu, Dude, Where's My Car saga on thedictators.com. We're still waiting for Tom Ridge to bust down the door to exterminate the Hillbilly Dictators Jihad. I hear Guantanamo is lovely this time of year.
...From the so far so good department comes big ups to nephew Ridge. To date, school seems to be coming along swimmingly. A full debriefing is scheduled for this afternoon as opposed to the half hour helping with the math homework as has been the scenario to date.
...Memo to DUFFLE owners: remember mini-camp is set for tomorrow (Wed) evening. We're gonna need a couple of new owners. Interested parties can contact your humble commissioner here.
August 23, 2004
...Well the last full week of the third quarter begins, and beach volleyball is still boring. Of course, only the contestant's mothers are watching for the competition, but its primary draw, that of pseudo erotic appeal, would seem to be little more than the underwear section of the Sears catalog---just animated. But as tedious as most of the events are, the Olympics are no different than a root canal in that both eventually come to an end. The biggest difference, as I see it, is that the dentist gives you narcotics to numb the pain after the procedure, while the IOC gives everyone a three hour mind numbing closing ceremony. So, root canal...Olympics. Root canal...Olympics. Its a tough call; let me get back to you on that one.
...Down goes Morganton! Down goes Morganton! But, "they're not dead yet." At 1-1 in their pool, the North Carolinians still have a chance to advance. And while we're talking Little League World Series, I'm about to do my second 180 on the television thing. Up to several years ago, I shared the concern of the too much pressure school of thought only to come to realize that the only ones gripping about the pressure were the adults. Now I'm about ready to pull the plug again if the announcing crew won't shut up for two seconds during any broadcast. Yes, I could mute the sound, but I'm begging ya to just shut up for short respites. I can live a full and enriched life without knowing the favorite pizza topping of each of the players. Attending the event looks like a lot of fun but has become a Yogi-ism in that its so crowded nobody goes there.
...From the land of cheese comes a rather pithy review of Little Steven's Underground Garage Festival on August 14. Rob seemingly knows the B side of every record released since 1946, so I often defer to his take on any given act. No doubt you too will find the review scintillating if you click here.
...Now for something a bit more serious. Friend, do you have a pain in the ass? Well, I've got your solution courtesy of our buds at the United States Postal Service who were kind enough to deliver this sage solicitation last week. Click here for details.
...Having always filed it away in the cliché/urban legend drawer until recently, I have discovered that it is axiomatic that hiring a lawyer is a hell of a lot easier than firing one. Perhaps the Georgia Bar can be of some assistance, but given that their member's faces adorn the back of every Yellow Pages book in the country leaves only an inkling of hope. Hey, everyone needs a hobby and now I have a new one in making this guy's existence a living hell---all without any heavy lifting. I have little doubt that I shall prevail, but we may end up sitting side by side at the clinic noted in the immediately preceding paragraph. But this whole ordeal could have been avoided in the first place. I could have just hired the bad Mo-Fo's to begin with.
...DUFFLE mini-camp is now set for Wednesday evening around 8:30 at Stately Suttle/Roberts Manor. We may need a couple more owners, and though it is truly a neighborhood league, owners are solicited from around the globe. We have one absentee owner and it went well at the draft last year. Email you humble commissioner for details.
August 22, 2004
...See, I did make some progress in cleaning up the site. With sloth like precision, I figure Suttle World will be a lean mean web machine by say March at the latest.
...Delighted to report, albeit late, that Morganton, NC (where I lived for 6 months or so several years ago to spend some time with my now dearly departed grandmother) is in Williamsport participating in the Little League World Series. They won their first game and play a team from California this afternoon (3:00 on ESPN2). I learned of this exciting news while watching other kids play last night. I insisted everyone watch at least a half inning of the kid from Rhode Island pitch. Not only is he amazing to watch, but he also is akin to a kid I caught in Virginia in my last year of Little League. Good ole Mark Richards was 6 foot at the tender age of twelve, with great athletic ability, and could basically reach out and hand me the ball from 45 feet. Bottom line, while he was easy to catch because he had great control, no sponge, batting glove or lengthy prayer could keep each pitch from ouching like a sombitch. So, here's to you Mr. Hand Hurting Rhode Island catcher.
...Maureen Dowd made a rather convincing case for her book (Bushworld---Enter At Your Own Risk) last night on the well hidden Tim Russert hour long interview show which airs on CNBC. Though we don't exactly see eye to eye on many issues, and that Dowd is self admittedly incredibly insulated from reality, having lived her entire life inside the Beltway, she comes off much more reasonable than a Peggy Noonan. So I'll give it a read and report back right after I finish Dick Morris's effort on Hitlary---perhaps the most frightening political figure in the world at present.
...Oh, and just in case your missed it, when asked if he knew then what we know now about Iraq, Senator Kerry says he would have gone through with the invasion himself much like the White House---just a kinder, gentler war. So now with his service record shot (as opposed to the Senator) and agreeing with the President over Iraq, folks are still eager to march to the polls to try to elect a guy with the most liberal voting record in Congress. I don't get it, but Cats did run for over a decade, so there's a lot of stuff out there I don't get. File it under "eat shit! 4 trillion flies can't be wrong." And should Kerry win, it can't be that bad---just ask the guy in Quebec who's been waiting eight weeks for his bypass surgery. We pay folks now not to grow rutabagas, can't we pay someone not to grow Democrats?
August 21, 2004
...This Saturday morning is a bit less stressful than the last, and given the below mentioned dog days of news and sports happenings, there is little to relay. So if you have no sage rants to share, why not clean up this stinkin' web site Suttle? Way ahead of you friends and the weekend affords the perfect opportunity to affect same. Some major revamps have been in the works for a while, but its easier said than done. Well, its actually pretty easily done, but since most folks don't publish their own hideous little website, I use the metaphorical forehead swipe as an excuse.
...One item of note is the arrival of THE INVITATION to the social event of the year: the wedding of Karen Winter and John Lanza October 9 in Old Saybrook, CT. And an impressive invitation kit it is. We were especially impressed with the preemptive enclosure of moist towelettes. But seriously ladies and germs----we are honored to receive the invitation, and we are terribly impressed with adults who pay the freight for their own nuptials. If pop wants to drop $25,000 on his little girl's big day when she's 25 that's one thing (down payment on a house type thing for instance, but that's just me), but for the more mature (Karen and John's young appearance and heart notwithstanding [Sic: CYA])... Good job guys, for what its worth. I have developed a deep affection for Ms. Winter over the past couple years through our brief meetings and email, and from personal observation, Lanza appears to stand up quite well on his own. Regardless, Suttle World has its money on a long happily ever after situation in the works. To paraphrase President John Adams: "We cannot guarantee greatness, but we can deserve it." To that end, these folks are more than deserving in my never so humble view.
...Another tid bit of Haj Impossible/Abu, Dude, Where's My Car? is that Yo and I had a chance to meet and speak with Mrs. HDM. We had seen Zoe on several occasions but never had an opportunity to introduce our nutty selves. She is every bit as charming as her spouse..., wait, she's just as kind as HDM..., wait... She's a very nice lady with a beautiful kid and a very lucky spouse. Jake turns two in December, perhaps he can receive a copy of the live CD as a birthday gift!?
August 20. 2004
...A more final version of the Haj
Impossible/Abu, Dude, Where's My Car? saga is now available for full view.
Miss Karen asked to link from 
.
As always, I'm flattered to oblige and felt the piece required a bit more work
(actually it needs a lot more work, but you get what you pay for). Check
it out. You will note there are no references to pics. That
might be because not once did a shutter click during the four day ordeal.
...Ole dealin' Gino and Ridge get over on some shoes. Ridge was Jonesing for a pair of Etnies or some such footwear. The best we could find was around $60, but good old ebay comes to the rescue at a total cost of $48. Given our similar net worth, both Ridge and I appreciate the $12 savings.
...Yeah, the Olympics are going better than expected, but these are the dog days of news and sports. The Braves have the NL East locked up with half of the Philly roster in intensive care. The President's infomercial is still two weeks away as is the start of the NFL season. High school ball starts around these here parts this weekend, but without a dog on the street, our household has only passing interest (damn, I'm funny). On the other hand, I believe Ridge is going to a game tonight with a buddy---no doubt to study play calling tendencies and the intricacies of zone versus man coverage. Or maybe to scope out chicks. Can't remember which.
...Another yeah---it was your humble web publisher that said over a year ago that John Kerry was the only Democrat who had a chance because he had a war record. Little did I know that he would have to run like the proverbial scalded dog away from same. Still, he did go. I did not---maybe being 10 years old at the time had something to do with my situation, but I just want to keep the record straight. Maybe the campaign can call in George O'Leary to handle the situation. I know its getting old, but I still believe it to be a salient question: for whom would Osama vote?
August 19, 2004
...Well friends, after much pecking and consternation I have come to the opinion that an entire essay (while still a possibility) is just a lame attempt to mitigate my stupidity. Consequently, here's the short version of Haj Impossible/Abu, Dude, Where's My Car? Some of the work you have to do yourself. While this page is in desperate need of a haircut, if one scrolls down far enough, one can be in the know of all that was scheduled up to our time of departure and the meticulous planning that went into same. It is here we pick up our sordid saga.
...More good Olympic news: Badminton at 4:00 this morning----what's not to like? Table tennis this afternoon I think. This is the stuff I want to see. And, again, my takes about this whole Olympics being a cluster fornication are being proved more wrong daily. Nice to be wrong still. Get my bad picks out of the way before football season starts.
...Wanna see something really scary? Click here. There's horrification o plenty for everyone in the pic itself. The added captions would be of added interest to those in The Dictators underground.
...Speaking of The Dictators (you know, the band we didn't get to see in NYC last weekend), many thanks to Mr. van Zandt for his efforts to mend the seemingly always torn world's greatest rock n roll band. For my part, may I humbly suggest that all involved "take it like a man [and] get fired up!"
August 18, 2004
...Yeah, as I anticipated, Monday was one of convalescence. Consequently, the Haj Impossible/Abu, Dude, Where's My Car Massacre (in four part harmony) is far from completion. But let not your hearts be troubled friends, the work is underway and Vegas has completion of the epic today or Thursday now at even money.
...Nephew Ridge reports his first day at newly opened Tucker Middle School went well. Says things couldn't have gone better class and schedule wise. Though getting a late start, the school would appear to be a bit behind as well, coming up short on some text books, etc... Normally, such issues would be cause for concern, but Yo has nothing but praise for every person with whom she has dealt during the enrollment process, etc... (and that don't happen very often folks--my spouse is an appropriately rather discriminating individual). Bottom line---not every duck was in a row when they opened this sucker two weeks ago, but DeKalb does as well as anyone in the metro area in the government education business, so it'll all work out just fine.
...Nephew Ridge take two. With his
triumphant return, 
is back in business. Look for a even more professional and
user friendly web interface, plus Duesenbergers can look forward to the
door-to-door pitch. Ridge is a client of Suttle World, but Suttle World
also would endorse Ridge's services regardless of whether he had paid me a
quarter or not, making him the first revenue producing element of this web site,
now well into its second year.
...I continue to delight in being wrong about how the Olympics are going to date, but beach volleyball is still boring. Still my early morning schedule coincides with the stuff I want to see---some field hockey this morning and team handball Thursday at 6:00 am. I haven't watched much of the prime time offerings, except some swimming last night, so I'm unsure as to how insufferable the "big time" coverage is. I do know what is insufferable is NBC's web site---could I please just print a day long schedule of all offerings on all channels at all times? Did anyone play with this as a "user" before signing off on it? Yeah, the New Coke guy, I'm guessing.
...Highlight of the bands we did get to see in New York was The New York Dolls. The concept was a little scary to begin with, but after learning they had played some gigs in London lately, I thought there might be some hope. Not only was there hope, they were GREAT! Johansen looks and sounds good (in an almost grandpa kind of way) as does Sylvan(?). Great set with a well selected list. No Gene Simmons nor mention of same. It was a once in a lifetime kinda deal and well worth the price of admission. Bo Didley was great too. I can't say I'll see Ray Charles again (and ironically, he could never see me), but I can say that I did. I may never see BB King again, but I can say that I did. I hope to see Bo again, and now I can at least say that I did. Dude will be 76 December 30. Watching his set I got the distinct impression he had done this performing thing before.
August 17, 2004
...OK, I'll give it a shot, but I'm going to put the narrative on a different page cause this is gonna take a while.
...You just have to wait for the Haj story. Its rather similar to Alice's Restaurant, except we never had to go to court or pick up the garbage. Still, it is an epic tale for the ages (from our department of redundancy department) that is deserving of greater thought than this still road weary early morning web bon vivant possesses.
...Welcome back nephew Ridge!!! Though his arrival was delayed until Sunday evening, Yo's account of the enrollment process at the brand spanking new Tucker Middle School was seamless beyond her wildest expectations. A shout out to the nice folks up there who I have yet to meet. But if my dear spouse sings your praises, then I am certain I shall soon chime in. Regardless, Ridge is to begin classes thing morning. Departure from stately Roberts/Suttle Manor is 8:00. Though classes do not begin until 8:40, the ever prepared Yo wants to be a bit early to ensure all the i's are dotted and t's crossed We still don't have a good handle on transportation. The school is just .75 mile or so, but with no sidewalks on a somewhat busy two lane road... Reckon the Suttle Shuttle is going to be employed and justifiably so.
...Though in the out of touch mode while hajin' (didn't know anything about how the PGA was going before Sunday afternoon---though Bill and I got to the hotel to see the final 6 holes or so and the playoff), what I have seen and heard about the Olympics is far from the doom and gloom I have been predicting for over a year. The fact that they've only sold 50% of tickets available notwithstanding, I cannot recall being more delighted at being dead wrong about a take. It is my most fervent desire to be as wrong about the hideous venue, transportation, etc... take as I was as, oh say, losing a car in the middle of DC. But that's another story as promised above.
August 12, 2004
...: One Ms. Yolanda Roberts will be front and center for Little Steven's Underground Garage Festival in New York City Saturday! Having committed to getting niece Jessica settled in at Georgia Southern to begin her freshman year Friday, the possibility of her attendance was thought to be impossible, but this is Haj Impossible where all is possible. The travel gods would appear to be on our side in that with the introduction of a new discount carrier into the Atlanta market (Independence Air), there is currently a fare war underway Atlanta to DC---the hub for Independence. $100 round trip with no restrictions, blackout dates or advance purchase. Just walk up, pay and fly. So....we shuffled the cards. Yoland will get Jessica moved in, leave Statesboro for Hartsfield-Jackson and board a flight that will arrive at Dulles around midnight Friday. Fortuitously, Bill and I have reservation at a Dulles hotel, as we motor up the the highway to NYC. I'll roll over to the airport (a grueling 3.8 mile trip) to pick her up, and Saturday morning we all pile in the car for the final leg to Jersey. Our return is not affected either, in that we have until 2:30 or so to get her back to Dulles on Sunday for her return flight. Bill and I shall continue to motor homeward, making an overnight stop at dear old dad's home and old fart offspring rest stop. Meanwhile, Yolanda fetches nephew Ridge from Calhoun and enrolls him in the brand spanking new Tucker Middle School on Monday as was the plan originally. Now say that three times fast.
...Grip not about the weather my friends. If its Suttle in NYC the weather will suck, though I must admit this is the first hurricane I'll be bringing along (I'm saving the tsunami for the next trip). But as of this writing, the Weather Channel, and local NYC TV affiliates agree on a forecast for Saturday: 30% chance of scattered showers and a high around 80. Despite my climatological record in the big apple, the studious meteorologist in me says Bonnie will break up quicker than a raided crack house, affording little difficulty in the northeast. The second storm is another story, but any effect will be post festival, so bring her on. Memo to tropical weather: xxxx. Plus, given Bill and I shall make the NNE approach to DC, as opposed to the ENE, we should have smooth sailing for the majority of our ten hour fun run Friday. Yeah, we're all freakin' crazy. What are you going to do about it? Are you looking at me?
...And another thing...with Gene Simmons sitting in for the NY Dolls on Saturday, one must assume the set list will include Looking For A Kiss. Quite a contrast now that I think about it---the handsomest man in rock n roll on the same bill with the two ugliest men in rock n roll (Simmons and Iggy).
August 11, 2000
...Well this page has certainly gotten out of hand, having failed to archive older stuff and all, but that must wait for another day. For now a recap of the issue at hand---Haj Impossible. Our travel plans are detailed in the graph below. Of course, this is primarily about The Dictators, who are among the headliners at Little Steven's Underground Garage Festival in NYC Saturday. 35 bands beginning at 11:00 am, with the headliners starting at 4:00. The entire lineup and schedule can be found here. In addition, sources inform this reporter that a major development will be announced in the next 48 hours. Being the dutiful journalist that I am, I shall obey the embargo and not reveal the REALLY BIG NEWS til cleared by the powers to be. Check back early and often for updates. One tidbit I can pass along is that the show will be carried in its entirety on Sirius---the satellite radio folks (not to be confused with XM Radio). Sirius has two channels devoted to van Zandt's efforts and HDM's show Thursday nights. Not hard to decide who the winner is in this battle for providing satellite radio signals.
...Received very kind email yesterday from one
Robert Crook of Jackson, MS. He relates that the Mississippi brigade of
the Hillbilly Dictators Jihad will be in attendance this weekend. He
certainly has his bonifides in order, having seen the Tators in '75. A
membership kit has been forwarded, with my full expectation that our ranks will
be growing soon. Of course, you too can apply for membership.
Details on the
page.
August 10, 2004
...Preparations for Haj Impossible are well underway here at Hillbilly Dictators Jihad World Headquarters. As it stands now brother Bill and I shall depart before the sun rises Friday and head to DC for an overnight stop at our Candlewood Suites room ($40 total on Priceline). If its anything like the one Yo and I stayed at on the '02 Summer Haj (Nashville), this is quite the bargain. They have two properties in ATL, and I can give them the Suttle Seal of Approval without reservation (damn, I'm funny). Saturday night we're in lovely Newark. Hey!, Ramada at the airport for $50...no doubt with a great view of the Garden State's most pleasant northern region. Yes, if God were to give the planet an enema, it would be stuck in Newark, but a bed is a bed, with easy mass transit into Manhattan and Randall's Island. Only concern at this point is that we don't get the wrong directions and end up at Riker's Island. As opposed to the normal route of straight up the 85/95 corridor, we have opted on the scenic route---taking 85 to 77 to 81 to 66 (at Front Royal, VA) and then to Dulles. Same mileage, truly more scenic and we get to avoid Greensboro's construction and Richmond traffic. A fine new hymnal is under construction for the trip---details to follow. And now comes the announcement that Gene Simmons will sit in and play bass for the NY Dolls! The other guy died recently (cancer), as have most of the original Dolls, but Johansen will be there.
