Archives---November, 2007

November 30, 2007

...Props and a huge shout out once again to cuzin Jim, the now Richmond resident and best buddy of Suttle World 35+ years ago.  Suttle World had dropped the ball in the keeping up department, but greatly looks forward to receiving its copy of his book on hitting (baseball) that was published a while back.  Not bad for a chap who had to settle on Princeton.

...Suttle World believes each and every financial market to be seen is meshugana as it has ever witnessed.  Only five more 300 point days required before New Year's eve, and the DOW is at the Suttle World predicted 15,000 level.  At this writing, DOW futures are up well over 100 points.

...Word on the street says that Dallas beat Green Bay in an NFL game last night 37-27.  Having recently shifted media buying choices at stately Roberts/Suttle Manor, the game was unavailable for Suttle World to view, and, quite frankly, Suttle World forgot about the whole deal until the aforementioned rumors started this morning.  If Suttle World can forget about the biggest game on the NFC regular season schedule because it isn't on its tube...(see Suttle Security Council Briefing, November 29, 2007).

..."(AP) LONDON - Like UV rays and diesel exhaust fumes, working the graveyard shift will soon be listed as a "probable" cause of cancer. It is a surprising step validating a concept once considered wacky. And it is based on research that finds higher rates of breast and prostate cancer among women and men whose work day starts after dark."  Suttle World can just see the anticipation on the gentle surfer's face as it awaits the obligatory, smart ass, dismissive remark.  Unfortunately, it makes a lot sense to Suttle World.  Submitted for the gentle surfer's consideration:  disrupting natural circadian rhythms diminishes immune systems.  Diminished immune systems are more susceptible to viral infections.  Viruses are believed to be responsible for over a third, if not more, of all cancers per: a school of thought to which Suttle World subscribes.

...Time to spin the BCS wheel one more time tomorrow on Conference Championship Saturday.  A complete rundown of the weekend ATL sports schedule (excepting the NFL Network) is here for the clicking.

November 29, 2007

...This just in:  the ticker-tape parade scheduled for Friday along Constitution Avenue in the District of Columbia has been cancelled, as the mighty fighting Colonials of George Washington University fall to #2 UCLA (or #1, depending on which poll the gentle surfer eyeballs) 83-60 overnight on the west coast.  As disappointing as the loss was, the parade's cancellation is probably not such a terrible thing, given there is no more ticker-tape, and that no building on Constitution stands more than 5 stories tall.  Next up, Auburn at the MCI Center in DC Saturday evening.  Also of note, is that the Colonial Babes (5-2) are currently ranked 16th in the AP poll, and travel to Vegas Saturday to take on UNLV.

...Aside from being a compulsive liar, perjurer and serial rapist, former President Clinton is a very bright guy.  That being said, Suttle World wonders as to whether Clinton has had an early onset of Jimmy Carter Disease (JCD).  First, the President tells a crowd in Iowa that he opposed the Iraqi war from the get go, when there's ample evidence of his statements to the contrary over five years ago.  This leaves Suttle World curious if Clinton was lying then or now.  Then comes the real jaw dropping HUH?---tax cuts cause illegal immigration.  In the bigger scheme of things, Suttle World's take is that Hillary is starting to feel a little heat---a necessary element in the Suttle World promised coming meltdown, and concession speeches in Iowa have historically provided a fine platform for such pyrotechnics. 

..."NEW DELHI (Reuters) - A 200-year-old cannon wheeled out by Indian villagers to greet a visiting minister exploded after being overstuffed with gunpowder, killing two men, a newspaper reported Thursday."  The story makes no mention if any of the Indian city's marauding monkey population were also among the casualties.  What the wire story does include is this photo of a cannon with the caption "A woman walks past a cannon at Jamestown Settlement, a museum of 17th-century colonial Virginia,..."  What?!

...Seems to Suttle World that the big loser in the NFL Network only game tonight between Green Bay and Dallas is the NFL.  74 million homes don't have access to the channel, and while those who go without may be pissed off, the real losers are advertisers who will reach maybe 10% of the audience such a game would garner if broadcast via the usual outlets.  As a whole, the NFL has surpassed every other pro league in the dollar department because they've been smart.  This aint smart.  Tough week for the league in general---a scintillating 3-0 Monday night game on an unplayable field, the tragic death of Sean Taylor and now most of the nation being blacked out for the best NFC regular season game on this year's schedule.

November 28, 2007

...What a relief!  It took a while, but the message has finally sunk in, and Suttle World has now disposed of all prescription and over the counter analgesics in and around stately Roberts/Suttle Manor---a decision that will save untold amounts of money and potential side effects.  Following the 104,273rd TV spot, Suttle World now knows that if it hurts to simply call Ken Nugent (advertising ambulance chaser extraordinaire for the gentle surfer not familiar with local TV in the ATL).  Suttle World is unsure as to exactly how attorney Nugent will relieve its splitting headache or joint inflammation, but he is going to get Suttle World a check if Suttle World hurts.  Sure helps to simplify life, especially around the holidays.

...This just in:  the YouTube "debates" are dumber than dirt.  As opposed to two Castro impersonating midgets asking Mitt Romney what his favorite color is, Suttle World proposes a different theme for one, or both, of the party(ies) joint news conferences---The What the Hell are You Going To Do About $8-10 TRILLION Debt Debate.  Health care, immigration, Iraq don't count, because "when there's no future, there cannot be sin...," and $8-10 TRILLION of debt = "NO FUTURE!"*        *-At least not much longer than the natural life of Suttle World.  Yes, Suttle World can cure the infectious debt, though reaction would greatly shorten Suttle World's above mentioned natural life span.

...Two weeks ago, Suttle World would have guessed that Hannah Montana was the sister city of Helena.  Today, her show at the Arena at Gwinnett is the lead in local "news" with YUPPIE parents pissing and moaning about having to shell out $1,200 a ducat to shut up their snotty kids.  Suttle World would like to apologize to the world wide web for taking up precious band width with this paragraph.

..."(London Daily Mail) - Mice resistant to cancer have been created in a breakthrough that could lead to a human treatment free of side-effects.  The breakthrough hinges on a mouse gene called Par-4 [that produces a certain protein]. U.S. researchers genetically engineered a group of mice to have higher levels of the protein than normal."  Yes, that's US researchers---the same ones who will cease and desist from such activity under the utopia that will be "universal health care."  For the gentle surfer who catches the short bus, R&D is fueled by a profit motive.

...Big night on the collegiate hardcourt with #1 North Carolina taking on Ohio State at 9:00 (EST), followed by the mighty fighting Colonials of George Washington taking on #2 UCLA in Los Angeles at 10:30.  The former is televised by ESPN, the GW game is supposed to show up on Fox Sports Network, but Suttle World is unable to find any mention of same when checking its local listings.

...Despite increased security, weather delays, several lay overs and lost luggage, on this day 487 years ago Magellan reached the Pacific.

November 27, 2007

...This just in:  Washington Redskins safety Sean Taylor died early this morning from gunshot wounds sustained in an apparent burglary of his Miami home early Monday morning.

..."(NYT) - Senator Edward M. Kennedy, the most prominent surviving member of the Kennedy family, has agreed to sell his memoirs for an advance of more than $8 million, people with knowledge of the negotiations say."  Suttle World is struck with a couple of thoughts.  First, props to Ted on the deal that will put the first real earned income into the Kennedy fortune since Papa Joe bit the big one.  Second, Suttle World recalls a similar deal accepted by Mick Jagger 10-15 years ago.  Mick returned the advance with apologies, explaining he simply couldn't remember enough of his life to write an autobiography---leading Suttle World to wonder if Ted's efforts will ever be published.  OK---well, three thoughts.  Will one of the chapters be titled:  Chappaquiddick/Rut Ro?

...Down goes Gailey!  Given the miserable manner in which the Tech sideline was managed during the Georgia game last Saturday (per: alum on the scene), Chan must have known what many suspected about his tenure, and Suttle World can well see that its time for a change---fresh blood, and all that.  Firing a coach with a winning record does raise a few questions:  mainly what does Tech want?  If its 9 wins a year, Tech aint gonna find anyone to take the job, and suggests the school hire Suttle World at a significant discount.  Belichick won't win 9 a year, and neither will Suttle World, but would be cheaper and a hell of a lot more entertaining---bringing its double naked steak offense back to North Avenue.

..."(AP) AIKEN, S.C. — Alexander D. Smith, 31, was charged with disorderly conduct and two counts of forgery after he walked into [a] bank and tried to open an account by depositing a fake $1 million bill, said Aiken County Sheriff's spokesman Lt. Michael Frank."  Suttle World has long been on the record as a staunch opponent of the death penalty, but is willing to go along with sterilization for certain crimes of capital stupidity.  Dude is 31, and could continue to add to the gene pool if not dealt with in a swift and certain surgical manner.

...Old news---after beating Mount Saint Mary's and Boston U. handily, Suttle World found no particular reason to immediately check GW's contest against the Terriers of Maryland Baltimore County last Saturday.  Looking forward, the 2-1 Colonials play tomorrow night in Los Angeles against second ranked UCLA.

...LONDON (AFP) - The Jackson Five, the group that launched the career of pop superstar Michael Jackson are planning to reunite for a tour as early as next year, Jeramine Jackson told the BBC on Monday."  Promoters have indicated the act will be located in a tent between Lobster Boy and the Bearded Lady.

November 26, 2007

...A dull, down day of recovery for Suttle World marked the close of the holiday weekend, and this morning will provide yet another object lesson as to why Suttle World Headquarters is so desirous of a change of venue.  Much needed rain is ready to begin in earnest (and old ernie is pretty pissed about the whole deal), but will fall on the Monday morning rush hour commute that requires both adult denizens of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor to combat the highways and byways of north metro ATL at break neck speeds approaching 25 MPH.

...Much has been written about how grateful Suttle World is for the newly installed Wii.  Now its time for a pow-wow at the Manor for exactly what the price point is to surrender the gaming system that, by all reports, is simply not to be found.  If some clown wants for fork over $6-700 (all twenties please) for the sucker, Suttle World speculates that the denizens of the Manor will gladly do without for a month to turn such a handsome profit.  No, do not contact Suttle World, unless the gentle surfer has 40 or more of the aforementioned twenties with which to part.  At $800, there's no meeting/decision necessary.

...If the gentle surfer followed Gene, the Caucasian's, advice from yesterday, it would already be up a goodly amount in pursuit of its Wii.  The teaser paid 9:5 easily, and puts prognostications well into the black for the season.  Fantasy wise, its not looking so good in Suttle World, as its entry drops its third straight---falling to 9-3, and holding on for dear life for one of four playoff positions.  Finally, Suttle World was indeed surprised that the Eagles gave the Pats such a hard time last night, but suggests that the gentle surfer would find any team that came within a touchdown of New England to be surprising.

...Missouri is #1, followed by West Virginia, Ohio State, Georgia and Kansas.  Suttle World will take the bottom half of the top ten (Virginia Tech, LSU, USC, Oklahoma, and Florida) matched up against the top half, give points, and be wealthier when the hypothetical games end.

November 25, 2007

..."NEW YORK (AP) - According to ShopperTrak RCT Corp., which tracks sales at more than 50,000 retail outlets, total sales rose 8.3 percent to about $10.3 billion on Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, compared with $9.5 billion on the same day a year ago. ShopperTrak had expected an increase of no more than 4 percent to 5 percent."  Props to the consuming crazy, who come through again, and save the American that was teetering on the brink.  Suttle World speculates that its a number that may squelch the naysayers of Wall Street long enough for a Santa Claus rally, be it deserved or not.

...Georgia was the better ball club coming in, and when the better team gets every bounce to go its way...Of course Kansas was going to lose last night.  Unfortunately, West Virginia didn't hold up its end of the bargain, with the #3 team in the nation defeating a RANKED UConn team.  Only eight hours or so to go until this week's BCS lottery.  Onward Rainbow Warriors!  The numbers are out there for the finding, and Suttle World believes they will show the "over" strategy for the college season to have proved successful/had the gentle surfer gone over on every college game on which action was taken, the gentle surfer would be way ahead.  Of other note:  yes Suttle World is painfully aware it took an overtime for Carolina to beat Duke, but its a win; Wake Forest will not have an opportunity to defend its ACC championship; Tim Tebow is your Heisman winner.

...Bob Ryan on this morning's edition of ESPN's The Sports Reporters indicates that today's line of New England -24 v. Philadelphia to tie the all time record spread from 1982 when the then dynastic 49ers hosted an expansion Tampa Bay team.  Suttle World advises staying far away.  Suttle World has not kept score at home, but believes he occasional Gene, the Caucasian, picks this season to be barely in the black, and last week's teaser probably changed that from red figures.  So why not get some spending money for Christmas shopping with another 3 team, 6 point teaser today (net):  JAX -2 v. BUF; BAL +14.5 @ SD; and BAL @ SD over 32.5.  Pays 9:5.  A final NFL note, Suttle World truly enjoys the Falcons playing on Thursday nights, and favors that the tradition continue in perpetuity. 

November 24, 2007

...A rather abbreviated update as Suttle World begins preparations for the return journey to stately Roberts/Suttle Manor.  The big news, of course, is #1 LSU taking another tumble, and the old, fat guys in the ugly coats are getting very nervous.  Kansas v. Hawaii should draw a huge audience as "national championships" go.

...And a reminder for the gentle surfer that the Georgia Rules of Evidence will be amended by a prayer meeting on the steps of the Georgia State Capitol Monday morning.  Supplemental spending is on the prayer docket for Wednesday.

...Georgia/Georgia Tech kicks off at 3:30.  A complete listing of ATL TV sports listings for the remainder of the holiday weekend are here for the clicking.

November 23, 2007

...And a lovely Thanksgiving was had by all four who sat at the holiday table at the Suttle World western North Carolina satellite headquarters, as Suttle World hopes was the case with each gentle surfer.  The journey was generally uneventful, but Suttle World from here forward will cease and desist from disclosing any travel information.  Obviously many a gentle surfer took its cue from Suttle World and deferred their driving until Thursday morning. While the company on the road was flattering, it was a tad much for Suttle World's liking.

...One in eleven adults in the United States will buy a flat screen television during the holiday season.  Too bad the economy is in such bad shape, or there could be a real run on the suckers.

...Unfortunately few of the aforementioned 9% adults had already made their purchase prior to yesterday scintillating NFL action that featured three games with combined scores of 102-42---real thrillers each.  And yes, the marquee matchup on the tube today is on the college gridiron, featuring #14 Hawaii against #17 Boise State. 

...Today's activities in the higher elevations are TBD, excepting that no encounter will be made with any retail establishment.  The return passage is set for tomorrow morning, meaning that Saturday night's action at the House of Pain will, unfortunately, be missed.  Its gonna big a humdinger of a card for High Velocity Wrestling  that "will start out with a fatal four-way TABLES, LADDERS AND CHAIRS [oh my] MATCH in which a team team from each faction (The Conspiracy, The EOD, The Party of 4 and The Revolution) will battle it out, with the winner being the faction that Buff Bagwell will represent as he takes on Viper in the main event for the HVW Championship Title!"

"BEIJING (Reuters) - Thousands of people in northeastern China have protested on the streets and surrounded government offices demanding help recovering money from a get-rich-quick scheme to raise ants to make an aphrodisiac tonic."  The Chinese are catching on.  Next up mortgage bailouts and universal health care.

November 22, 2007 - Thanksgiving Day

...Thanksgiving Day 2007.  Hard to believe, but Mr. Calendar says it to be the case, and given that scores of volunteers have gathered in the darkness of New York City to tether and guide the inflated ego of Bill O'Reilly down Broadway, he must be right.  Suttle World is thankful for so many things that it is truly hard to single out any one for fear of overlooking others.  Still, Suttle World is thankful that today will bring the first meaningful Lions game in the last 40 turkey days; and Suttle World is thankful for hydrogen---first on the periodic table, but simply taken for granted as the ubiquitous reliable friend that constitutes 80% of the atmosphere.  The gentle surfer can add a brief update, left to others to relate, to its own litany of nouns for which to be thankful.

...First, a reminder from cuzin Paul from up Vermont way, who relates a few of Lincoln's words as he officially declared the holiday in 1863---a year that saw emancipation, draft riots in New York and nearly 200,000 causalities sustained by both sides in an ongoing war between the states.

"The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty God.
    -- Abraham Lincoln, in his 1863 Thanksgiving Proclamation

...Second, a short treatise from cuzin Matt that Suttle World has kept in its back pocket for several weeks.  Somehow it seems appropriate for today.  Published in its entirety below, Suttle World would hasten to add to a compendium his essays are always to be found at the accompanying link.

THE OLD NEIGHBORHOOD

Our neighbor John holds an honor which is probably uncommon.  At the high school he attended, a showcase holds two basketball trophies: one has his
name and the other beside it has the name of his son.  How often is it anymore that a son attends the same high school that his father did?

In our family, my father lived in Wyoming, Iowa, Texas, California, and Georgia between his high school attendance and mine.  After high school, I
lived in seven different places before my dog attended obedience school (the best example of a son I have to offer).  Most modern families move
around a lot, following jobs, family members, climate, or adventure.

My parents were adventurers.  After a vacation to California in the early fifties, they went home, quit their jobs, sold their home and belongings,
and drove to California to start a new life.  It was a pretty daring act for farm-country mid-westerners at the time.  It all worked out well. 
However, I was not able to attend high school in my father’s hometown in Wyoming.

At Old Oraibi, in Hopiland, the Hopi Indians have lived in the same town since about 1100 AD, nearly a thousand years.  My family roots are lost
after about one hundred years.  Imagine knowing your ancestors of thirty generations ago walked the same paths.  Hundreds of years before Columbus
sailed, your people were building homes, farming, playing and praying in the spot where you lived.  You would know that the dust of their bones,
their breath, literally their hearts and souls were in you and beside you each day.

In some ways, the strength of the American culture comes from us being lost children.  We know little about our pasts, so we look to the future.  But
in that, we lose a comfort in who we are because we are not really sure who we are.

Matt Bruner Tonopah , Nevada parking lot Halloween, 2007

...Happy Thanksgiving.  Next update from the Suttle World western North Carolina satellite headquarters.

November 21, 2007

"NEW YORK (AP) -- A record 38.7 million U.S. residents were expected to travel 50 miles or more for the holiday. Some were hoping to beat the evening rush on what is often called the busiest travel day of the year.  In all, about 4.7 million U.S. residents (each with a "carry-on" the size of a donkey) were expected to fly for the holiday, according to AAA."---may God have mercy on your souls.  Suttle World and company confess to being a part of the .7 million of that group that shall embark on the legs of its voyage Thanksgiving Day and Saturday morning.  The other 38 million are crazy people who Suttle World will avoid at all costs---eschewing the publics highways and byways long before nightfall for the corpulent crush of commuters.  Remote publication is expected over the early portion of the holiday weekend from the Suttle World western North Carolina satellite headquarters.

...Props to the good folks at Norton Records.  Great cyber follow-up on the phone order placed last week, and the quick ship of the "new" Dictators release Everyday Is Saturday that FedEx dutifully delivered to the front gate of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor yesterday morning.  The exhaustive liner notes/catalog will necessitate a purchase of the full sized vinyl version at a future point, but for now there's plenty of listening and reading to be had.  Also included in the goody bag was a current copy of the Norton catalog---all packaged in a really cool four color lp like sleeve.  "The leaders in Turban (click to enlarge) Contemporary"---what's not to like?  

...The 2-0 Colonials of George Washington University return to the hard-court Saturday against Maryland-Baltimore County with on #2 UCLA in Los Angeles looming on the schedule next Wednesday.

November 20, 2007

...It is Suttle World's sad duty to inform the gentle surfer this morning that it may now squeeze the Charmin without fear of admonition, as Dick Wilson, the kind but crotchety Mr. George Whipple who appeared in more than 500 different TV spots for the ass wipe over the course of 21 years (1964-85), has left this mortal coil.  TV Guide.com's obit is particularly insightful: "In addition to the ad campaign..., Wilson played a drunk on several episodes of Bewitched"  A bit redundant, no?  Also noteworthy was a 30 year film career that included a stellar performance with Don Knotts in the classic "The Ghost and Mr. Chicken" (1966)  Wilson was 91, and died in a Los Angeles hospital due to being 91.  AMF  Mr. Whipple, an American icon.  God's speed, and please send the best regards of Suttle World and those of the gentle surfer to Madge and Josephine, the plumber.  A special thanks to the world's greatest wife, Yolanda, a contributor to this Suttle World update.

...Props to Liberty Mutual who showed some on their hand over the weekend by signing Tom Glavine to a one year, $8 million deal.  It helps the ballclub, and gives some indication that new ownership is willing to compete in the free agent market.  Cuzin Sal of Bean Town has picked Coco Crisp as the next Braves center fielder, but the future still remains fuzzy to Suttle World, and may well remain that way until opening day and beyond.

..."LONDON (AP) — Brian May, rock star and astrophysicist, has been appointed chancellor of Liverpool John Moores University.  May will be installed as the university's figurehead leader early next year, it was announced Monday. The 60-year-old Queen guitarist said the appointment was "a great honor and a great new challenge."  "Brian May is an intensely talented individual who achieved global success with Queen," said the university's vice chancellor, Michael Brown, in a statement. "In this age of celebrity culture, it is rare to find someone who has fame, fortune and universal acclaim and yet who remains true to his core values of learning and enlightenment."  He was an astrophysics student at Imperial College when he joined Freddie Mercury and Roger Taylor to form Queen in 1970, but dropped his doctorate as the glam rock band became more successful.  May is the co-author of Bang! The Complete History of the Universe, which was published last year."  Let's see an astrophysicist who wrote Tie Your Mother Down on a guitar he built from scratch with his own two hands, and played with a six pence.  Suttle World finds Mr. May's resume to be rather impressive.

...Conditions of the various denizens of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor have improved---altering it from the seeming field hospital status of the past couple days.  Those afflicted with the first common cold to circulate about the Manor have abating symptoms, while others continue to ouch in varying degrees depending on when and how badly one "fall and go boom" over the past several days.

November 19, 2007

...There's been a shakeup at the top of the DUFFLE standings, as cuzin Bill dispenses with Suttle World in short order to take control of first place.  Three weeks remain in the regular season, and three playoff spots would appear to be sewn up, with three other teams fighting for the fourth and final slot (including nephew Ridge who got Tom Brady back yesterday...).  The winner's share for  DUFFLE Bowl VI has now climbed above the $500 mark.

...A long weekend is still finishing up around stately Roberts/Suttle Manor in anticipation of this holiday "shortened" week.  Yet another truck leased from the nice folks at Budget (Enterprise does a good job periodically, but Suttle World is a Budget enthusiast for consistently pleasant experience renting cars or trucks, especially given price) requires returning from its current resting point in drive of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor.  Once again Suttle World opines that Helen Keller could not have dwelled in stately Roberts/Suttle Manor, as each piece of furniture and major appliance in the Manor has been imported, deported or moved to a different wing in the past month.  This just in:  no emergency medical treatment was deemed necessary following a big league  fall sustained by the lady of the Manor as she prepared to return the above mentioned truck.  Banged knee and twisted ankle, but no actionable injuries received.

...2 afflicted with a hideous rhinovirus and one injured = abbreviated update for Monday. 

November 18, 2007

..."GUWAHATI, India (AFP) - Troupes of monkeys are [still] out of control in India's northeast, stealing mobile phones and breaking into homes to steal soft drinks from refrigerators, lawmakers in the region have complained.  "Monkeys are wreaking havoc in my constituency by taking away mobile phones, toothpastes, sipping coke after opening the refrigerators," Hiren Das told Assam state's assembly.  Efforts to drive out the animals is complicated by the fact that devout Hindus view them as an incarnation of Hanuman, the monkey god who symbolizes strength."

...Aside from #3 Oklahoma's loss to Texas Tech, it was an uneventful day on the college gridiron.

...Suttle World is curious.  If the Redskins should win the toss this afternoon prior to their game with the Cowboys this afternoon in Dallas, can they defer to Thanksgiving day, and bring in the Jets (Dallas' opponent Thursday) to play in their stead?  Today's teaser from the break even Gene, the Caucasian, as the usual three team, six point deal (net):  WAS +17 @ DAL; WAS @ DAL over 4; and KC +20.5 @ IND. Pays 9:5.

November 17, 2007

..."VALENCIA, Spain (AP) - The Earth is hurtling toward a warmer climate at a quickening pace, a Nobel-winning U.N. scientific panel said in a landmark report released Saturday, warning of inevitable human suffering and the threat of extinction for some species."  Meanwhile residents in Argentina and Brazil are wondering if this winter will ever end. Buenos Aires recorded this Thursday (November 15th) the lowest  November temperature in 90 years. Temperature in the downtown weather station reached 2.5C. Since records began more than a century ago, only two days had colder lows in November. It was in 1914 (1.6) and 1917 (2.4). And ninety years ago the urban heat island effect was much less pronounced than nowadays.  In Brazil's southernmost province Rio Grande do Sul in Brazil temperatures fell to 2.3C.  In Sao Joaquim Monday's (Nov., 12) the temperature was -1.2 C with frost.

..."Boston Globe - Boston police are launching a program that will call upon parents in high-crime neighborhoods to allow detectives into their homes, without a warrant, to search for guns in their children's bedrooms."  In the meantime, Suttle World has launched a program where it will wander about the Boston Police Department, without invitation, to investigate the law enforcement agency and its evidence locker,  just to make sure everything is Kosher.

...Props to our friends at Google who keep Suttle World up to date on its global reach.  A case in point:  it took only a brief mention of June Jones' Hawaii Rainbow Warriors for Suttle World to show up on a site pimping real estate in the 50th state (www.oahurealestatesales.com).  For the late rising gentle surfer, Hawaii kept their perfect record intact last night with a 26-24 win over Nevada.

...As if the college football season hasn't been whacky enough, today's schedule features the worst nationally televised game in the history of the medium when 1-9 Notre Dame takes on perennial 1-9 Duke in South Bend---beamed coast to coast on NBC with a 2:30 kickoff.  Now that's entertainment.  Ohio State/Michigan has a curious noon start, and Georgia/Kentucky kicks off at 12:30---the only game today featuring two ranked teams.  Playoff?  Res ipsa loquitor.

...From the mail bag comes word from Ms. Miriam of Norton Records that the Suttle World order of The Dictators "new" release was shipped yesterday.

...The Hawks got off to a reasonably good start at 3-4 before losing at home last night to a hapless 1-7 Seattle team.  Hideous---getting beat in your own building by an awful team that traveled 2,700 miles.

...Starbucks (SBUX) closed yesterday down just a fraction after shares fell more than 9 percent at the open of trading Friday on numbers released Thursday evening indicating stagnate growth for ubiquitous java purveyor.  Asked about Starbucks woes, business analyst Suttle World explained, "there are two kinds of people in the world:  those who will stand in line for the privilege of speaking in tongues to pay $5 for a cup of mediocre coffee, and those who won't.  Those who will are already in line.  No, the party's not over for Starbucks, it just isn't going to get any bigger any time soon, as they follow the exact same model that left McDonalds floundering for nearly two decades."

November 16, 2007

...The Official Suttle Record Annotated has long stated that Barry Bonds is first and foremost an asshole.  That being said, Suttle World finds the indictment of Bonds yesterday in US District Court to be the stuff of Leona Helmsley and Martha Stewart--- a high profile, largely disliked, personality who is charged with a crime for the entertainment of the public.

...For the just waking gentle surfer, another #2 team bit the big one, with Oregon falling to Arizona 34-24 Thursday night.

..."BEIJING (Reuters) - A Chinese residential community has issued a list of acceptable behavior for its inhabitants and is threatening to take away their allowances and subsidies if they don't comply, a newspaper said Thursday."  Suttle World is pleased to see further progress in China that is now apparently attempting to imitate the US tax code.

...Wii continues to be a big hit at stately Roberts/Suttle Manor, and as previously related by cuzin Paul (whose household took possession of one of the games last year), quite surprisingly, bowling is the most popular of the half dozen sports games currently available.  Nephew Ridge now holds the house record, "rolling" a nifty 212 yesterday afternoon in only his third day of play.  Of course, Suttle World is now hard at work lobbying for a duckpin version.

...Some guy in New Jersey is either going to ship a copy of The Dictators "new" release to stately Roberts/Suttle Manor or buy himself an HDTV with the credit card number provided to the seemingly just awakened chap who answered the phone at Norton Records yesterday morning.

November 15, 2007

...Oh happy day!  Yesterday actually (or Tuesday, Suttle World hadn't checked in a couple days), but its here!  Andy Shernoff's closet cleaning efforts are now to be had from our friends at Norton Records in the form of The Dictators "new" release Everyday Is Saturday---"The all-true adventures of The Dictators, from pre-punk shenanigans to the sound of Young America to the death of rock n' roll!"  Its a double CD featuring demos of many of the tunes the gentle surfer has come to know and love, along with some stuff that has never seen the light of day, including a few pre-Manitoba cuts from 1973!  The only downside is that further patience is required in the ordering process.  Click the link for Norton, and follow the exhaustive purchasing process that will probably involve mailing a check, order form, and waiting by the mail box.  Well worth the wait, and a cause for celebration in the streets in and around stately Roberts/Suttle Manor.  Suttle World may find it necessary to have the Norton folks toss in the recent re-release of the Wierdos lp in the goody bag.

...Congratulations to buddies Aaron and Stephanie on the two week early arrival of nearly seven pound baby boy yesterday afternoon (4:53 EST).  A telephone message reporting the blessed event is the only info Suttle World has on the delivery, excepting that mother and new Lawrenceville resident Spike are said to be doing well.  More news as its available.

...Props to cuzin Bill for the pizza and fellowship yesterday evening at his lovely Norcross domicile.  Memo to new buddy Ken:  should old white guys from either Boston or Wisconsin begin banging on your basement window, please do not shoot.  They are customers, not intruders (at least not intentionally).  

...Georgia Governor Sonny Perdue prays for rain, and it rains.  Given this model seems to work, Suttle World is more than willing to look the other way with regard to the First Amendment, and allow the entire Georgia state government to cease operations, save holding prayer meetings on the Capitol steps.  Its really a more efficient system.  Next week, the governor will pray away crime, with pining for divine intervention in filling pot holes on tap for December.  Even Suttle World wants in on the action.  After figuring out how to order The Dictators CD, Suttle World will devote the remainder of the day to prayer for tonight's lottery numbers.  Suttle World would also pray for a pony, but Democrats have already promised to deliver on that upon their election next year.

...The mighty fighting Colonials of George Washington University move to 2-0 on the young hoops seasons with a 69-56 win over Boston University in DC last night.

November 14, 2007

..."(Bloomberg) -- U.S. stocks rallied the most in two months after Wal-Mart Stores Inc.'s profit beat analysts' estimates."  OK, so the market revolves around the Wal-Mart performance.  This leaves Suttle World curious as to why Wal-Mart shares haven't moved in either direction in nearly five years.  Regardless, a 300 point rally is always welcome, and the gentle surfer is reminded:  "its a stock picker's market."  That'll be $250 please.

..."(AP) GAUHATI, India  - In a Nov. 13 story, The Associated Press incorrectly reported that Paris Hilton was praised by conservationists for highlighting the problem of binge-drinking elephants in northeastern India. Lori Berk, a publicist for Hilton, said she never made any comments about helping drunken elephants in India."  Huh?  Suttle World speculates the confusion is the result of continuing monkey attacks---guerilla warfare, if you will.  "(Fox News) NEW DELHI —  A wild monkey went on a rampage in a low-income neighborhood in the Indian capital, injuring several people, most of them children, police said Monday. Police sub-inspector Gaje Singh told The Associated Press that the attacks started late Saturday in the Shastri Park area of New Delhi, adding that it was not immediately possible to give an exact tally of the injured. Local news reports said as many as 25 people were injured."

...In mice, a low-carbohydrate diet slowed prostate tumor growth, possibly because fewer carbohydrates leads to a drop in insulin production, U.S. researchers say.  The study is published in the Nov. 13 online edition of the journal Prostate---now there's a page turner/scroller.

...The mighty fighting Colonials of George Washington University look to extend their perfect season to 2-0 as they host the defending America East Conference champion Boston University Terriers tonight at the Smith Center (7:30 EST).

November 13, 2007

...Its Christmas in November at stately Roberts/Suttle Manor---literally (ok, so maybe there wasn't a virgin birth and such, but Suttle World would ask the gentle surfer to go along with the program here).  It was early evening as the world's greatest wife made her predictable entry, and summarily presented the Manor with its very own Wii.  Suttle World and nephew Ridge had begun a conspiracy to get one of the prized units onto the grounds, but there were legitimate doubts about it ever coming to fruition, much less in mid November.  Regardless, we now Wii.  It was Suttle World's first ever encounter with the contraption, but after a couple of hours of piddling, Suttle World finds the gaming system to exceed its expectations.  It truly features physically interactive gaming with a very minimum of "mechanical" gear.  Wanna bust a 300 yard drive?  Just hold the TV remote sized controller as one would hold the grip of a golf club, and make a good pass.  Wanna throw a left jab?  Then, jab on brother, jab on.  In fact, going three rounds against lesser computer opponents is a pretty good workout/involuntarily  cause consumption of larger portions of the atmosphere.  This is in direct contrast with other new generation video games that require the dexterity of a neurosurgeon combined with the memory of an idiot savant to simply run a play off tackle---a state of affairs that led Suttle World to abandon the medium many moons ago. The nuances are yet to come, but the simplicity makes visions of a Tuesday night bowling league, or weekend Olympics, very real possibilities, if not certainties.  And then there's potential interconnectivity...  This is gonna be fun, and dare Suttle World say, even top the pending release of The Dictators "odds and sods" lp (and  the Macy's parade) as the highlight of November.  A more cogent review to come, as Suttle World continues its diligent investigation.  For now the guest daily fee structure is:  Seniors (45+) Free. Everyone else pays their age, excepting teens who pay triple their age (includes cart).

...The above celebration has pushed back today's promised rant regarding alleged high infant death rates in the US about which Suttle World is pissed.  This will probably take the form of a weekend excursion, allowing the chance for the unheard of concept of research.

..."(AFP) NEW DELHI - Just weeks after the Indian capital's deputy mayor toppled to his death fighting off a pack of monkeys, the animals are back on the attack, sparking fresh concerns about the simian menace.  Along with an estimated 35,000 sacred cows and buffaloes that roam free in the capital, marauding monkeys have been longstanding pests."  Suttle World couldn't make this stuff up, and provides this link to Breitbart.com so that the gentle surfer may find confirmation.  For the record:  no, Suttle World, does not wish to touch your minkey.

November 12, 2007

...The nattering nabobs of negativity---the unemployed extra cast from Night of the Living Dead who now roam the countryside in zombie like fashion chanting "recession," may finally have a point due to a complex dynamic of which Suttle World only understands a small portion.  For the younger gentle surfer, a point of elucidation would seem in order, for if the gentle surfer is not well into its 30's, it has no recollection of a recession that is an economic term synonymous with poor overall economic conditions (actually its two consecutive quarters of negative GDP growth, but who needs charts and graphs at daybreak).  Regardless, a downturn is possible (Suttle World is a long way from calling it a certainty), and for the gentle surfer who has done reasonably well during the last 25 years or so, there's a solution:  buy real estate!  Even better, gather the cash pile together, stock up on thermal underwear, and wait til the first of '08 to buy really cheap real estate.  The most nattering of the nabobs would have the gentle surfer believe that by just waiting, owners will hand Quitclaim deeds to the gentle surfer as they pass the tenth story window of the 25 story building off of which they have jumped.

..."(AP) PLYMOUTH, N.H. - Presidential contender John Edwards is introducing a $400 million plan Monday to help veterans with post-traumatic stress disorder, including those recently returned from combat in Iraq and Afghanistan."  Tough to argue with that one, but Suttle World does wonder exactly how a veteran with PTSD would fit treatment into its busy schedule after a full day of work, night school, a doctor's appointment and riding his very own pony provided for in previous Edwards (voted the Carolinas' top ambulance chaser three consecutive years) spending plans.  The other question raised by the initiative is as to whether there will be any help  forthcoming for those suffering from PTED---post traumatic Edwards disorder.  Next week, a $200 million spending plan for the forgotten millions afflicted with ingrown toenails.  Suttle World is of the opinion that there is no challenge large or small that Edwards will not spend someone else's money to "fix."

...Memo to Suttle World:  take a deep breath, step down from the bell tower and collect your thoughts for a rant regarding today's story on the "abysmal" US infant death rate.  Typically, Suttle World is merely amused by the hate America first crowd, but this particular subject (and that of allegedly comparing infant mortality rates) is the stuff of downright deceit and bad faith reporting that causes Suttle World's bowels to buckle---very similar to the junk "science" that makes Al Gore a Nobel Laureate.  Suttle World shall calm down, and expand on the point tomorrow.  In the interim, memo to fetuses worldwide:  if not already here, feel free to advise mom and/or dad that you'd just as soon be spit out in the US as any other country on the planet from a purely obstetrical point of view. 

...Suttle World is sad to say that its time to put Joe Gibbs to sleep and/or send him back to NECKCAR.  Like any other devoted Redskins fan (stipulated as redundant), Suttle World wanted nothing more than to return to the good old days of the early 80's.  The talent isn't runneth over, but there's enough, and sufficient time has passed, to be better than a .500 ball club.  Alas, Washington is just another NFL team---a state of affairs intolerable in the Redskin nation even if it does mean dropping uncle Joe off at the dog track.

...LSU is number one in this week's BCS lottery, as their ping pong ball popped up first from the hopper Sunday evening.  Meanwhile, Suttle World speculates as to exactly what its gonna take for June Jones to get some respect.  With Glanville gone, Suttle World can be a Rainbow Warrior itself for the 9-0 Hawaii team.  That's one hell of a business card:  "June Jones, Head Football Coach, Rainbow Warriors."

November 11, 2007

...Down goes Ohio State!  Down goes Ohio State!  Two weeks before Thanksgiving, and let the fusterclucking be heard loudly from each roof top!  Suttle World fantasizes of eye gauging brawls between the backers of rival teams to break through the doorways of the nation's pubs and roadhouses into the streets for full public view.  Nobody, Suttle World repeats:  nobody, has any idea of which school belongs where in the bigger scheme of things (i.e. who's #s 1-5?).  Look at the 2007 college football season from any angle and it makes about as much sense as Dan Rather trying to rustle cattle with two chipmunks and a jar of Vaseline.  Memo to all fat men, donning ugly sports jackets and affiliated with bowl games:  President Bush has a mission for each of you that may well determine to fate of America itself, and calls on all to immediately assemble in Terminal 1at JFK to embark on a clandestine, long-term, fact-finding mission inside Iran.   And so ends today's beating of the now very unsavory carcass of the dead horse that is a playoff. 

...Not true---a few more Saturday gridiron takes.  Once again Suttle World finds Georgia deep in the bush leagues demeanor wise, but hastens to add that it is well aware of the scoreboard.  Were Suttle World an opposing coach still on the Georgia schedule, it would be inclined to bring in head Buckingham Palace Guard dude for a consult.  Memo to the Dawg nation:  regardless of intent, showing up en masse with blackface may not the image you wish to portray to the rest of the world.  If the gentle surfer had Notre Dame +16 against Air Force, you lose!, as the frightful Irish go to 1-9.  AMF to the Orange Bowl that hosted its final Miami game yesterday following 70+ years of dedicated service, and in as much disrepair as the U.   Its a ballpark to which Suttle World never got, and, by all accounts, missed absolutely nothing for said failure.  The Hurricanes took full advantage of the big day by making it the first home shutout loss (Virginia 48 Miami 0) since Oct. 4, 1974 against Auburn, and the worst defeat since losing 66-13 at Syracuse on Nov. 28, 1998. The last time Miami lost by more points at home was in 1944 versus Texas A&M.  Thanks for the memories.  Props to Florida's Tim Tebow for his seven touchdowns yesterday against Spurrier, and the Heisman Trophy he took along with him as a lovely parting gift.

...Dallas in the Meadowlands against the Giants at 4:15 this afternoon is well deserving of the NFL's marquee matchup in an otherwise somewhat unremarkable week 10.  Run Adrian run!---or so sayeth the oh so shrewd Suttle World who waited patiently and took the rookie running back in the fourth round of this year's DUFFLE draft---the draft that immediately preceded the current season in which the Suttle World entry is 8-1.

...(AP) SANTIAGO, Chile - The king of Spain [Juan Carlos] told Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez to "shut up" Saturday..."  Props to Juan, and feel free to tack on a knee to the groin in your next encounter with ole feces face.

...Aside from beating the White House about the head and shoulders, any measurement by one of any political stripe has to characterize the current Congress as one of the great failures in the history of the legislative body.  Bias or not, Karl Rove, does a succinct job of summing up the mess in a Wall Street Journal op-ed piece Friday.

..."(AP) From "Wicked" to "The Phantom of the Opera," from "Mamma Mia!" to "Rent," most shows did not go on Saturday as Broadway stagehands walked off the job, shutting down more than two dozen plays and musicals."  First network TV, now Broadway musicals---the next thing the gentle surfer knows, box lacrosse players are on the picket line, and entertainment in the US ceases to exist.  Oh, the humanity!

November 10, 2007

...An arrest has been made in last week's murder of Linda Stein. (WCBS TV) reports:  "Caustic and abrasive Stein was riding her employee pretty hard last week in her Fifth Avenue apartment. The employee said Thursday night she just turned on Stein and killed her out of frustration.  CBS 2 HD later learned from prosecutors that in addition to murder, Natavia Lowry, 26, admitted taking Stein's ATM card and withdrawing $800 from the realtor's personal account. Lowry was arraigned on murder charges Friday night in Manhattan and is jailed without bail."  If not for each gentle surfer, it was certainly true for punk rocker, Sheena---"New York City really has it all."

...Hawks take a thumping on the road Friday night (106-83) against a Celtics team that seems determined to recapture its dynastic status. 3 or 23 points, its still not one of the 40 "W's" the gentle surfer had penciled in at the season's start.

...There have been happier days in and about Classic Village---the hamlet over which stately Roberts/Suttle Manor looks, and there will be, no doubt, happier days to come.  Just not today.

...Excepting for perhaps the Florida/Boozapalooza deal, it doesn't get much more insufferable than Auburn at Georgia, but such is today's marquee matchup according to the august pollsters.  Suttle World is still unsure how a Georgia team that got beat by a South Carolina team that has lost three straight can be ranked tenth, but readily admits that any argument regarding more than ten better schools would get down to quibbling over the final 3 or 4.  Auburn is another head scratcher---once again begging THE question of the college season as to whether the parity in the SEC is one of highly competitive or greatly overrated ball clubs.

...This just in:  "(AP)  NEW YORK - Norman Mailer, who gained instant literary acclaim with his first book, "The Naked and the Dead," has died, his literary executor said Saturday. He was 84."

...The mighty fighting Colonials of George Washington University get their 2007-8 campaign underway in the nation's capital this afternoon against frequent NCAA tourney entrant, Mount St. Mary's (2:00 EST).  The Colonials hit the national stage November 28 in a FSN televised matchup against second ranked UCLA in Los Angeles.  Eight George Washington basketball games during the 2007-08 season will air on 1050 AM WFED Federal News Radio.  All other GW games, including today's, can be heard on 3WT Radio 107.7 FM.  It would appear as though the Atlantic 10's TV deal has been moved from early Saturday afternoons to early Saturday evenings, and GW should show up a few more times than in seasons past.  Closest physical encounters---at Tuscaloosa/Alabama, December 29, and at UNC-Charlotte, March 6 (an ESPN broadcast).  The A-10 returns to the beauty that is the boardwalk of Atlantic City in March---taking the conference tournament to the third world city for a second straight year (March 12-15).  Was Newark already booked?  The Fordham folks not able to find an empty gym in the Bronx?  Memo to the A10:  you can't get to Atlantic City from here/anywhere unless one is riding next to a blue haired lady on a Greyhound bus.

...In other college hoops ramblings, Carolina remains atop its number one perch. If Suttle World is correct, Gardner-Webb, the school that bitch slapped Kentucky in Rupp earlier this week, is located in the state of North Carolina, not far down the road from the alma mater of the mother of Suttle World, now known as UNC-Greensboro, that put a serious whooping on Georgia Tech last night. App State over Michigan.  Been a pretty good autumn for the Carolina schools.  Finally, Suttle World was stunned to find plenty of tickets remaining for Tech at Georgia January 9.

...Suttle World believes it to be intuitively obvious to the most casual gentle surfer that there is something fundamentally wrong/unjust about Merck having won 10 of 15 cases related to Vioxx to date, and then capitulating with a $5 BBBillion settlement yesterday.  More distressing is that Suttle World has yet to imagine any acceptable means of preventing such situations in the future, excepting to point out, once again, that a stern Bar is the only governor of the matter currently, and is unlikely to act for the interests of justice in lieu of the substantial personal enrichment of its own members.

November 9, 2007

...Weather Channel founder John Coleman's essay further debunking the idiocy that is global warming can be found here.  Of course, Coleman and his ilk are merely experts in the fields of meteorology and climatology; and lack the necessary credentials of certain beefy, Nobel Prize winning, internet inventing individuals who can accurately predict the weather 100 years out.

...Memo to Republicans:  pay no attention to the Mitt behind the large check.  Suttle World believes the Mormon "baggage" to be much lighter than others have estimated, but is of the definite opinion that Romney is a young Bob Dole in the electability department.  Dude has all the charisma of motor oil, and also strikes Suttle World as not having the highest SAT score among the viable GOP contenders.

..."(Yahoo! Sports) An eight-month Yahoo! Sports investigation has revealed that Heisman Trophy-winning running back Reggie Bush and his family appear to have accepted financial benefits worth more than $100,000 from marketing agents while Bush was playing at the University of Southern California."  Meanwhile, Suttle World reports that the University of Southern California sold 250,000 Bush jerseys at an average price of $125/ea.  

...Pssst....Thanksgiving is two weeks from yesterday.  The gentle surfer may now officially push the panic button if appropriate.

...The fearless Cruis-O-Matic (and their newly very spiffified web site)  tunes up the gear for a gig Saturday night at Twilight Bar and Grill in lovely, albeit distant, Newnan, Saturday, with a show set for the following weekend (November 17) at The Irish Bred Bar in Rex.

November 8, 2007

..."(The Daily Mail) - Despite their radical difference in size, these two dogs have something in common - Gibson the Great Dane and Boo Boo the toy Chihuahua are both world record holders.  Measuring a whopping 107cm, gentle giant Gibson was named tallest dog back in 2004. Joining him in the hall of fame for 2007 is tiny Boo Boo who only measures 10.16cm tall and is smaller than Gibson's head."  Judging from the accompanying picture, Suttle World speculates that the dogs exchanged cell phone numbers so that the might be able to hook up in the near future.

..."(AP) Washington — Millions of Chinese-made toys have been pulled from shelves in North America and Australia after scientists found they contain a chemical that converts into a powerful "date rape" drug when ingested. Two children in the U.S. and three in Australia were hospitalized after swallowing the beads."  Suttle World can understand a little lead contamination here and there, but roofies??!!!

...The first true freeze of the season arrived a week or so earlier than the norm overnight, with ambient temps falling below the 30° mark in the environs in and about stately Roberts/Suttle Manor.

...A couple of belated items from the obit page.  More than a week has passed since the murder of Linda Stein---former Ramones manager, and immortalized as Sheena.  New York police are questioning suspects, but have made no arrests in the case.  Of more recent note, is the loss of Lillian Ellison a/k/a The Fabulous Moolah---as big a name as there ever was in the history of women's professional wrestling, who left this mortal coil near her Columbia, SC home at the age of 84 last Friday.

...Major props to the pride of Boiling Springs, NC, the Gardner-Webb Runnin' Bulldogs for rolling into Rupp Arena and opening a tall boy can of whoop ass on 20th ranked Kentucky 84-68 Wednesday night in the 2K Sports College Hoops Classic.  Not exactly Sha-Na-Na over a #1 Virginia, but damn near as much fun.

..."SPOKANE, Washington (Reuters) - A [600 pound] cow plunged from a 200-foot (61-metre) cliff onto the hood of a minivan on a highway in central Washington state, according to police."  Final score:  vehicle occupants OK  Cow 0.

...To this point, Suttle World has believed that talk of unrest in Venezuela to be the overly optimistic  words of dissident expatriates; and, obviously when a dictatorship is involved, reliable information is not exactly flowing freely, but Suttle World is beginning to believe the constant drum beat of revolution may actually have something to it.  Won't be next week, but Comrade Hugo could be shaking hands with Stalin sooner than Chavez anticipates.

...Yahoo Sports is reporting what Suttle World has believed would be an excellent fit:  Tom Glavine back in a Braves uniform.

...Props to the Hawks who come off the road to beat an excellent Suns team at Philips last night 105-96.  Winning the second of the back-to-back nights is how a team gets 40 wins---Suttle World's only request.

November 7, 2007

...The Drudge Report this morning indicates a new Rasmussen Poll is set to be released later today showing Hillary's lead  in New Hampshire to have dropped to 10 points over Obama since the last "debate," and down from a 23% advantage a month ago.  The meltdown is coming.  Meanwhile, the Washington Post is reporting this morning that Pat Robertson is set to endorse Giuliani.  Much like the Bob Jones pseudo endorsement of Romney, such happenings strike Suttle World as to just how unelectable Hillary is, should she win the nomination (and that's far from a slam dunk in Suttle World).  She'll get a lot more votes than Walter Mondale, but has an equal chance of prevailing in a general election.  Now that Suttle World thinks about it:  has anyone ever see Walter Mondale and Hillary in the same room?  This is not to be confused with Bill's White House theater, movie watching buddy, Eleanor Mondale, the former Vice President's daughter.  Some un-vetted, enterprising journalist is bound to ask at some point.  The meltdown is coming.

...Even the svelte Suttle World will be greatly amused at the food police's reaction to an article in the most recent edition of the Journal of the American Medical Association that says, "[a]bout two years ago, a group of federal researchers reported that overweight people have a lower death rate than people who are normal weight, underweight or obese. Now, investigating further, they found out which diseases are more likely to lead to death in each weight group.  Linking, for the first time, causes of death to specific weights, they report that overweight people have a lower death rate because they are much less likely to die from a grab bag of diseases that includes Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, infections and lung disease. And that lower risk is not counteracted by increased risks of dying from any other disease, including cancer, diabetes or heart disease." (NYT---God help us---Suttle World verified the story on JAMA site, so it is of the opinion that the Times didn't invent this one).

...Two tough road losses for the Hawks, and as a lovely parting gift, they return home and play Phoenix tonight---arguably among the top 3 teams in the league.  40 wins---that's all Suttle World asks.  It would be so liberating for Suttle World to cease to be compelled to beat the franchise about the head and shoulders.

...College hoops is upon us.  For the sixth time in the 46 year history of the AP preseason poll, Carolina is ranked #1, while the mighty fighting Colonials look to get the attention of voters when their season begins Saturday against the sometimes formidable Mount St. Mary's (Smith Center, 2:00 EST).  In fact, the A10 only shows up as an also ran in the form of Xavier in the first poll of the season.  The good news, is that the GW out of conference schedule actually includes schools with student bodies in excess of 500 (UCLA, Auburn, Virginia Tech, Alabama to name a few), providing a much needed platform from which to draw a crowd.

Memo to Don Shula:  shut up old man.  This bush league celebration of another team's loss is an annual embarrassment.  And once again Suttle World pines for an 0-16 Dolphins to compliment the 16-0 Patriots.

November 6, 2007

..."NEW YORK (Reuters) - Four out of five U.S. adults go online now, according to a new Harris Poll.  The survey, which polled 2,062 adults in July and October, found that 79 percent of adults -- about 178 million -- go online, spending an average 11 hours a week on the Internet."  As though there wasn't already enough pressure on Suttle World---now 80% of the universe stares at Suttle World as it stares out at a blinking cursor upon a study in white.

..."WASHINGTON (AP) - Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul (R/L-TX), aided by an extraordinary outpouring of Internet support Monday, hauled in more than $3.5 million in 20 hours."  Impressive indeed (especially with the $2300 maximum allotment of political speech afforded by the Supreme Court) if the surge in money was motivated by the message of very small government and very large portions of individual liberty, as opposed to the whacky isolationist position that makes Paul and his lot into unsupportable cartoon characters.  33,000 words of cabbage regulation can be repealed.  The income tax can be eliminated.  The insane war on drugs can be ended.  Isolating the US from the rest of the world cannot be done.  If the gentle surfer has any doubts, please refer to the above paragraph---just like 80% of the US adult population has.

...Suttle World is advised by its Vermont sources that the good times just keep on rolling for the State Champion Solon girls soccer team.  Seniors Kaitlin Waring  along with Zeljana Varga, Jill Dellipriscoli, and Joslin Parker were named to the Vermont All-State team, and will play in Sunday's scheduled Senior Classic.

...Good work if you can get it.  Six years and six days younger (and 347 wins more) than Suttle World, Greg Maddux reups with the Padres, inking a one year deal for $10 million.

..."LOS ANGELES (AP) — Late night comedy shows were the first casualties of the first strike by Hollywood writers against TV networks and movie studios in nearly two decades."  One day!!!!!!???  Surely the super human comic titans (Leno, Letterman, et al) had 5 minutes worth of material in their back pockets to get at least one more show on the air.  "Dancing With the Stars, one of the country's highest-rated prime-time shows, aired as planned on Monday night, with its hosts left to ad-lib."  Now that's courageous---speaking extemporaneously on a subject about which the judges are supposed have an expertise in 15 second intervals.  Granted, the hosts had a bigger fish to fry, so Suttle World will pass along a little material for the next show---if it dares press forward.  "Hi, and welcome to Dancing With the Stars;  We'll be right back after this;" and the ever popular "thanks for watching---we'll see you next time on Dancing With the Stars."

November 5, 2007

...Props to the Pats for  their come from behind win over the defending Super Bowl Champion Colts yesterday, but Suttle World will withhold judgment on the reliability of the final scoreboard until such time as the teams may meet again with Marvin Harrison wearing a jersey as opposed to a turtle neck.  New Englanders could legitimately counter that they too would like to see a rematch in which hankie happy zebras are not supervising the festivities.

...Suttle World's DUFFLE entry breezes to another win, pushing its first place record to 8-1.

..."AP LOS ANGELES - Film and TV writers resolved to put down their pens and take up picket signs after last-ditch talks failed to avert a strike."  Suttle World is undaunted, believing that an entire season of Modern Marvels (including the much awaited History of Feces episode) to already be in the can, and ready for airing.  Suttle World also has a suggestion: encouraging the entire non news and sports work force of the "entertainment" industry to show solidarity with their brother and sister scriveners on the picket line.  Finally, Suttle World offers to dodge pencil shivs and cross the picket line to lend desperately needed assistance with the rejoinder that more zeros on the check, the more yucks for the viewing public.  But seriously ladies and germs, beware the law of unintended consequences.  Twas AIDS that literally killed off a huge portion of the creative community involved in the TV and movie industries 15 years ago, resulting in hideous "reality" programming and the like that doesn't require writers, and continues to contaminate the gentle surfer's coax to this day.  So yeah, it can get worse.

..."(AJC) A 16-year-old passenger was killed Sunday night when a Mazda 6 and another car it may have been street racing lost control and struck two other vehicles in the Lawrenceville area of Gwinnett County.  The teen passenger in the Mazda died at the scene. Police withheld his name while they notified his family.  The Mazda's driver was critically injured and was taken to a local hospital, police said. The Honda's driver was not hurt, and the motorists of the other two cars were taken to a hospital for evaluation."  Prima facie evidence that Darwin is not being allowed to function as intended.  Cars are too safe, and, as a result, at least 2 perpetrators survive to leave their Mit)h like footprint upon the gene pool.

...The Montpelier High School website's current "Daily Announcements" page for Thursday, June 7, 2007 makes no mention of the Solons girls soccer state championship won over the weekend.  Memo to MHS:  Solons Girls Soccer Composts Competition!  Maybe that will help.  Meanwhile, Suttle World awaits word on parade preparations for the Green Mountain heroines.

..."BERLIN (Reuters) - A 70 year old German retiree secretly cut down or shortened 122 trees in a publicly owned forest to give his holiday cottage a clear view of the Baltic Sea, police said Thursday.  The man, whose tree-felling caused an estimated 15,000 euros ($22,000) of damage, is likely to be charged with damaging property and breaking conservation laws, officials said."  Charged?!!!!!  That's half the annual ergs of the entire European Union accomplished by a geezer with a chain saw.  Dude should be the grand marshal of the Solon's parade.

November 4, 2007

...A Saturday for the ages on fields of athletic battle across the fruited plane...

...Inside sources tell Suttle World that Phil and Tony Esposito opened an extra bottle of Chianti last night to toast the Dellipriscoli sisters and their fellow Montpelier Solons who captured the school's first ever girls Vermont State Soccer Championship yesterday with a 2-0 win over Woodstock in New Haven.  Junior Jill booted in both Solon second half goals, while Freshman netminder, sister Caroline shutout the top seeded Woodstock to capture the title.  More details to be found at the above link.

...Had Suttle World been asked, it would have estimated that many years would pass after the passing of Suttle World before Kansas hung SEVENTY-SIX on anyone, much less Nebraska.  And if you had Nebraska @ Kansas under 115, you lose!  Suttle World has been shouting of the coming parity in college football since regional cable channels started spurting a dozen or more games into any given household on any given Saturday.  Still, even after the past rumblings of Marshall or Boise State or Rutgers, critical mass would appear to have been reached this season.  The days of a dozen big national programs is long since dead and buried.  Now, can we have a playoff, please?

...It just keeps getting better...Navy beats the Domers for the first time since Roger Staubach was under center (1963) with a 46-44 (3 OT) win IN SOUTH BEND!  "...1 and 8 Notre Dame..." it just rolls off the tongue with such fanciful delight.  Meanwhile, LSU survives perhaps the most idiotic play call in the history of big time college football by Les Miles in a 4th quarter,  4th and inches situation, to escape Tuscaloosa with a 41-34 win over an Alabama team that snatched defeat from the jaws of victory.  Spurrier drops his third straight, but not before beating Georgia earlier this season---it just doesn't get much better than this; and there will be, no doubt, more whacky shenanigans while waiting for Ohio State to choke away their number one spot with the traditional season ending loss at Michigan November 17---a Michigan team that could, then, well be on a name game winning streak.  The same currently 15th ranked Michigan that lost its opener at home to Appalachian State---a "Division II" team that has two losses itself.  Bummer for BC fans, but, sadly,  it was a loss Suttle World anticipated.  12-1 could still shout mighty loud, despite a weak schedule.

...And the hits just keep on coming.  The drop dead NFL regular season marquee matchup is a mere 8 hours or so from kickoff when the Patriots visit Indy in a battle of the undefeateds.  Suttle World will gladly take the Colts plus 5.5, and very much likes 'em straight up with the money line set at +$205.  Of course, this is the same Suttle World that said the Redskins would easily cover the 16.5 they were being spotted against the Pats last week, when 22.5 wasn't even half enough in the six point, three team teaser offered for consideration.  Its a DUFFLE stately Roberts/Suttle intra-Manor brawl today as Suttle World's league leading 7-1 entry takes on the defending champion Mother Tuckers, who have struggled in their campaign for an unprecedented third championship.  Though not terribly enthusiastic, mixing in three big dogs (two at home) is too tempting.  Ergo, the Gene, the Caucasian, 3 team, six point teaser of the week (net):  IND +11.5 v. NE; MIN +13 v. SD; and BAL +15 @ PIT.  Pays 9:2.

...Final take on the sports page...belated props to the Atlanta Hawks for the their opening night 101-94 win over the Mavs Friday.  Joe Johnson falls 2 shy of the Suttle World suggested 30 point effort.

...Like many, Suttle World is most disturbed by the current state of affairs in Pakistan and Turkey.  Unlike many others, Suttle World readily admits to having no idea as to why it has these concerns.  Suttle World does understand that Turkey controls the US war effort's fate in Iraq, and that Pakistan is ostensibly an ally in the fight against radical Islam, while now a nuclear state under marshal law.  An aside to the above mentioned instances of international unrest that Suttle World has not heard mentioned is the "interesting" (Suttle World does not wish to connote a bias here, because it has yet to form one) lack of  any rally the two potentially explosive situations have had on the dollar, that remains at all time lows.  In the olden days, such events would have sent folks scurrying to the teller windows of the Treasury Department.  "Not anymore, man."

...The operative term is "US flagship carriers."  There are certainly other stellar airlines in the world  (many superior), but Suttle World prefers the good old regulated in the USA routes.  SriLankan Airlines faced a rebellion when they told passengers they were going to fly on a jet that had lost its wing tip in a runway crash.  Passengers had been on the Airbus A340 a day earlier when it sliced through a wing of a stationary British Airways 747 at Heathrow, delaying departure by 24 hours.  So they were amazed to be boarding the same plane next day for the ten-hour flight to Colombo.

..."Democrats seek better care for veterans" screams the AP headline, so that the gentle surfer can distinguish Democrats from other parties that seek worse health care for veterans.

November 3, 2007

...Championship Saturday has arrived.  begins upon the dampened pitch of Fair Haven, VT (Fair Haven Union High School) this afternoon at 1:00 as the Solon girls make another run at the Vermont State Championship taking on the tournament's number one seed, Woodstock.  Updates as they happen.

...(AJC) "Georgia Tech's entry [into the Defense Department-sponsored DARPA Urban Challenge autonomous robot car contest], an electric blue Porsche Cayenne, lost its navigation system and slammed into a wall at about 25 mph."  Project head Chan Gailey said that while disappointed with the results, he was confident the program was moving in the right direction.

...LSU at Alabama is the college gridiron marquee matchup of the day, and doesn't commence until 5:00 when it will compete with #6/undefeated Arizona State traveling to #4 Oregon---a contest that even the incredibly eastern biased Suttle World will attempt to take in (6:45 EDT).  A complete rundown of the ATL weekend sports schedule is here for the clicking.  The listings do not include the Falcons, who are blacked out at home, and no one cares.  Falcons game, test pattern, Three's Company reruns---no deefrauns!

..."(AP) WINTERSBURG, Ariz. - As authorities tried to understand why a contract worker would bring a pipe bomb to the nation's largest nuclear power plant..."  Not a scoop for the wire service, as Suttle World personally watched the, live, on the scene Fox News Bunny report yesterday that officials were, in fact, wondering why dude had a pipe bomb in his truck, "because it probably was not necessary for him to have a pipe bomb to do his job," said the Pulitzer candidate.  Pondering on the notion since, excepting, of course, for Teamsters, Suttle World has yet to identify anyone that would incorporate a pipe bomb into their daily work routine.

November 2, 2007

...Suttle World headquarters logged the incoming call at 9:21 (EDT; 11:37 SST).  Immediate action was required as news of the second seeded Montpelier High School Solons thrilling double OT semi-final win and incumbent result of the girls soccer team finding itself in the Vermont State Championship game Saturday came in.  The record will show that immediate, albeit, in keeping with the spirit of Suttle World, amateurish effort was taken.  Getting a link from our friends at the Times Argus up proved easy enough.  Further elucidation has proved elusive for the Suttle World staff---with no rosters, stats, etc.. to be found (or memo to whomever is maintaining same on the web:  check you meta tags).  This much Suttle World knows from both the Times Argus and its inside source in Montpelier:  the Solons are 13-2-2 in their fourth trip to the championship game in the past five seasons, and still looking for their first State Title.  Zeljana Varga (from Bosnian, roughly translating to Pele) is a junior scoring machine for the Solons, aided mightily by the senior leadership and scoring prowess of Kaitlin Waring.  The Solons will face  Woodstock on Saturday at 1 p.m. in Fair Haven.  Suttle World is prepared to go full bore, as was the case in riding the bandwagon to the Screech to Victory run of the unforgettable 2005 Vermont State Basketball Champion Solons, but needs a little more data.  Updates as they happen. 

...Unlike Democratic hopeful Barack Obama, if elected president, Suttle World would not open a dialogue with Iran, instead upon being sworn in, Suttle World would FedEx a DVD to Iranian authorities titled Daisy Cutters Gone Wild:  Spring Break, 2009.

...Don Imus now officially returns to the airwaves via WABC on December 3 per:  an anticipated announcement by Citadel Broadcasting yesterday.  Yes, they do stream, so with McCord alongside, we shall see.  All this as former radio legend John Tracht a/k/a the Greaseman announces a "hiatus" beginning after today's program.  Contract expired with the small metro DC station/flagship of the Colonials (WMET), and, well, we shall see.

..."(AP)-...[Led Zeppelin's] first concert in two decades, scheduled for Nov. 26, has been postponed until Dec. 10 after guitarist Jimmy Page fractured a finger, organizers said Friday."  Suttle World is of the opinion that particular version spins much better than enlarged prostate.

...Virginia Tech returned to doing what they usually do so well on Thursdays nights: winning ballgames, and Georgia Tech continued in its now long run of mediocre seasons as the Jackets had their asses handed to them at home last night.  Suttle World hastens to quell any pencil necked objection about academic and size obstacles faced by Tech by directing such whining up the road to Wake Forest.

...Very belated, but it has to be stated.  It just doesn't get much better than Steve Spurrier getting beat by Vandy.

...The Atlanta Hawks open their 2007-8 campaign tonight at home against Dallas.  Suttle World has been a constant critic of the franchise, but is also a realist that would consider a 40 win/.500 season to be a raving success, probably earn a playoff spot, and, if managed properly, afford the opportunity to build a strong foundation from a group of kids as young as they are talented.  Meanwhile, Suttle World suspects that no one has told Joe Johnson to not score 30 a night until a good chemistry is found. 

November 1, 2007

...The visual media paradigm of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor has shifted---an issue of no doubt great concern for the gentle surfer.  Regardless, following many hours of heated negotiations, white smoke emerged from the chimney of the Manor, and the denizens stepped onto the north portico to announce the great compromise that will allow Suttle World to reduce monthly net expenditures by $15 by virtue of dropping a heaping helping of cable offerings (most namely, the incredibly overrated HBO) in lieu of a Netflix subscription that has worked well on its first try.  Both Ramones DVDs arrived in a timely fashion, and the first provided some interesting/scary/amusing/awful video of the band in a very early gig (September, 1974) at CBGB.  It is now once again in the custody of the USPS, and whoever is next on the picking order is on the clock. 

...The gentle surfer whose futures contracts delight in $100/barrel oil, and $800/ounce gold is a damn happy gentle surfer indeed.  Bernanke probably went the right way the the 25 basis point cut yesterday, while holding out the carrot of another quarter point cut in December.  Suttle World is in the Steve Forbes camp that believes that market jitters related to the "credit crisis" stem not from the scope of the problem, but from not knowing exactly who owes what to whom.  Has the S&L bailout been that long ago?  Surely the gentle surfer recalls that wholly unnecessary, incredibly expensive fustercluck.  Everybody take a deep breath, and sharpen your No. 2 pencils.  Suttle World speculates that when the ciphering is done, the so called sub prime lending "crisis" will be quite manageable by the principals as opposed to the genius of Washington.  Suttle World would also add the the sub prime lending situation doesn't have a lot to do with the price of Microsoft shares---or 95% of the market that isn't directly related to less than 5% of the mortgage market.

...Georgia Tech has the opportunity to salvage something of a decent season tonight as they host ACC rival Virginia Tech at Bobby Dodd (8:00 ESPN).

..."ATHENS (Reuters) - Two thieves armed only with ketchup ambushed a supermarket employee as he was taking cash to the bank, Greek police said Tuesday.  "The thieves jumped out of the bushes and threw two big bags of ketchup on the front window to stop the car," said a police official who requested anonymity. The man fought with his attackers who managed to flee on a motorcycle with only 400 euros of the 140,000 euros he was carrying."

...Since the gentle surfer was wondering, Singapore Airlines says it will ask passengers on the brand new A380 super jumbo jet to refrain from sex while ensconced in one of its 12 first-class suites, which boast the world's first airborne double beds.  Singapore Airlines, the world's second-largest airline by market value, started commercial flights of the double-decker A380 last week with  Singapore-Sydney service.  Passengers have a different take in a Reuters story:  "So they'll sell you a double bed, and give you privacy and endless champagne and then say you can't do what comes naturally?" Tony Elwood, who traveled with wife Julie in a suite aboard the inaugural flight, told the Times of London.  "They seem to have done everything they can to make it romantic, short of bringing round oysters," Julie said. "I'd say they shouldn't really complain, should they?"  Suttle suggests that if the adventurous gentle surfer must, to pick the Singapore to Sydney leg--- where one arrives at the airport that does not have large signage listing capital offenses.

SUTTLEWORLD 
               
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