Archives---May 2006
May 31, 2006
...Revisiting the "just step away from the window slowly, sir" department, comes an opportunity for Suttle World to examine the omnipresent celestial forest in lieu of a sapling or two. Here in stately Suttle/Roberts Manor where many a dark, foreboding corner has dwelled for some time lies limitless amounts of floor space in full sun. In no order of importance and/or merit: Yolanda Roberts, Ridge Roberts, Matt Bruner, Bill Swartzbreg, Kieth Schoeman, Paul Waring, Salvatore Cincotta, Joel DeCaro, Karen & John Lanza, Ross the Boss, Handsome Dick Manitoba, Cindy Kieth, my mother, John & Johnnie Carson and so many other wonderful family members, along with noteworthy individuals who may not be listed---each of you in some manner comforted and enriched my time on the planet in the past several months, and I'm might obliged. Your simple human kindness is the light source for the aforementioned full sun areas. Suttle World resolves to sit in those areas as frequently as time and circumstance will allow. Enough of the sappy shit already! OK---two midgets and a transsexual walk into a bar...
...Email is all that if one treats keystrokes with the respect of quill and pen---a standard certainly never advanced at Suttle World. Several ongoing threads of great richness recreates the romantic notion of the Jeffersonian gentleman farmer tending to his dutiful daily writings. The technology may not have brought back the long lost art of correspondence for most, but certainly not all.
...Not looking good for the home team. The Gwinnett Gladiators face elimination in the final round of Kelly Cup play tonight up on Pinchaloaf Pkwy. Down 3-0, the Glads would have to win the next two at home and then travel nearly 4500 miles, and win two straight in Anchorage. Herb Brooks is dead, so is the Gladiators' season.
...The morning rant is rudely interrupted by the cat's presentation of an "I'm not dead yet" chipmunk. Yes, gentle surfer it was quite the sporting ten minutes or so and well worthy of weekday ESPN2 programming. Suttle shovels chipmunk. Chipmunk scurries. Cat "mouses" chipmunk inflicting further, but not fatal, trauma. Rinse, lather, repeat. Suttle gets the goal at the 2:42 mark of the third period with an assist to the cat. Gonna let Alvin rest paws up in the south 40 for a while before further animal control measures are performed.
...And that's the way it is. AMF May.
May 30, 2006
...Unofficial start of summer or not, people have to breath. If Memorial Day weekend proved to be a preview of coming attractions in the climatology department, expect a greatly increased number of publications from the western North Carolina satellite office during the coming months.
...In the, just back away slowly from the window, sir department, comes a void on the Brain Surgeons' site regarding their scheduled August 8 Atlanta date. The date is still up there but no venue is now listed---replacing the previously poorly chosen Kenny's Alley in Underground. Email regarding the subject has gone unanswered over the weekend. Of course Yolanda could just call her boyfriend, Ross the Boss, but by his own admission, he's not a logistics kinda guy. Hey, when you're the greatest American guitarist in rock n roll history you just show up where they tell you and play people's faces off. Updates forthcoming. No doubt, Albert Bouchard is just having some PC problems and will reply to email soon.
...Newt, Newt, Newt...Anyone who caught the guy on Meet the Press over the weekend, or at anytime in the last 30 years for that matter, has to realize he's 5 times the intellect and ability of any pretender to the throne that either major party could muster for 2008. And agree with Newt or not (a position in which Suttle World sometimes finds itself), one cannot help but admire the determination of taking a dream from the kitchen table in Carrollton to the Speaker's gavel. Alas, that's where the real rub lies---throwing away those 30 years of toil for an ugly piece of ass---that would keep Suttle World from punching the chad next the Newt. Hard to think of giving him the button when so little restraint has been demonstrated in the past. Suttle World would be willing to entertain any explanation from the Speaker, but none is forthcoming---too tawdry and all, you know?
...The dutiful Suttle World staff has done the math, and its official. There is a positive correlation between those pissed off at the Da Vinci Code deal and a lack of confidence in their own faith. It is also refreshing to see MEN in the Catholic hierarchy calmly explain that even if true, it wouldn't make a damn bit of difference. Its the same crowd that believes God isn't smart enough figure out evolution and put it into place. Seems if God can pull off (so to speak) the immaculate conception, he could also suck the Devine DNA out of any "heirs." Just play nice, and its all good.
...Yes, thank you, SOTD is hitting on all cylinders lately.
May 29, 2006---MEMORIAL DAY
...Suttle World leaves the pulpit to Tom Brokaw this Memorial Day as has been the case in the past. In The Greatest Generation he recalls a story told to him by two vets who had returned to Omaha Beach for the 50th D-Day Celebration. One recounted this story as they strolled along the sands:
"...that hillside was loaded with mines, and a unit of sappers had gone first, to find where the mines where. A number of those guys were lying on the hillside, their legs shattered by the explosions. They'd shot themselves up with morphine and they were telling where it was now safe to step. They were about twenty-five yards apart, our guys, calmly telling us how to get up the hill. They were human markers."
© Tom Brokaw, 1998.
Thank you.
...This is a big Suttle World heads up with the Memorial Day Holiday----NCAA lacrosse championship this afternoon. Its a great game being played by kids who will (the seniors anyway) most likely never pick up a stick again for the rest of their lives after devoting much of their short time on the planet to the sport, and Jim Brown went to Syracuse on a lacrosse scholarship. What more do you have to know?
...Glads face off against the Alaska Aces this afternoon at the Arena at Gwinnett (5:30) in game 3 of the Kelly Cup Championship series. The Anchorage squad leads 2 games to nil.
...Speaking of nil, the ever tedious World Cup is upon us. Suttle World has cracked the code on why soccer is so freakin' boring, but will withhold comment until they start kicking it around in Germany next month. Another reason to be thankful to be an American---we've got so much stuff to do that's more interesting than soccer---like watch the grass grown on the lawns in our "safe suburban slums."
May 28, 2006
...The spirit was willing, but the flesh had more sense, and, consequently, no Dickies were seen prior to the publication of today's SSC Briefing. Didn't want to make two shleps. Didn't want to make a late night shlep with no guarantee of getting in, didn't really want to wade into a crowd following a long 90º day of beer and a start time (1:00) three hours past my bedtime made it a no go. They're in Nashville in a couple weeks. Maybe a quick shot up I-75. Meanwhile, Rubber City Rebels is a definite as are the Brain Surgeons (with Ross the Boss) in August.
...And so how was the start of the holiday weekend enjoyed around stately Roberts/Suttle Manor? Sucking up as much store bought air as possible. Mid summer oppressive type conditions have set in with a high around 90 in steam room like ambience. Remember, its not the heat. Its the stupidity. At least it didn't happen in Chicago, where folks think a heat wave is the chance to turn their residences into Easy Bake Ovens---a peculiarity, crime or no crime (that diminishes greatly in times of heat), that escapes Suttle World entirely. See Lake Mi)higan.
...Tedious as the Indy 500 is, I always remember a co-worker in a former life of food management who said he ran THE KFC on THE road that led to the speedway and recounting what race day was like. Worse than the enduring the race I can assure you.
...Shout out to the multitudinous Warings of Vermont and several other folks. I am indeed a fortunate man to be able to call friends men of peculiar names who possess both wisdom and IQs to which I can aspire. It is a debt that I shall never be able to repay. In the meantime its a hell of a lot of fun. And while we're in the shout out department, one goes over the pond to cuzin Moke who should be on the back nine at some historic Scottish lynx at this writing. Enjoy the golf and haggis. Also thanks to today's SOTD contributor, Joel DeCaro of SoCal. A finer pen pal the internet has yet to find.
...Suttle World's annual take on Memorial Day shall wait until the holiday itself tomorrow. Til then, play nicely among yourselves.
May 27, 2006
...Short and sweet for a Saturday over a holiday weekend, but more material in this graph than written and published in the AJC in the last 24 hours.
...Not discouraged, but the Dickies thing is turning into an ordeal. First, what to do with the kid. Second, no tickets. Its first come, first serve for the last day of Bubbapalooza at the Star Bar. The festivities begin at 4:00 and the Dickies are scheduled to be on at 1:00. Suttle World was advised that folks could show up early, get their hands stamped and return. Again not insurmountable issues, but getting the gang to make two shleps may prove difficult. Yet to be determined (will call later) if one can go down and go Allen Iverson by arriving early, paying for say four folks, getting stamped in four different locales and get four folks in later. And they ask me why I used to drink.
...Mentioned while eating a the Sangria's bar last night with hockey on the tube: Carolina winning the Stanley Cup would be a miracle. Before moving from Hartford, the, then, Whalers were the Clippers (has Hawks replaced that metaphor?) of the NHL. Then after their move, the team literally gave away a car at every home game and still couldn't draw more than 5,000 any given night. That was only 5-7 years ago. Hey if the Islanders could win four straight (remember boys and girls, Suttle World is ancient and remembers the Islanders expanding into the league in '77 along with the Flames. They were Clipper/Hawkesque for many years) and the Devils come to great success of late, anything is possible in the irrelevant National Hockey League. Suttle World gave up after franchise number 47.
...Speaking of irrelevant, the Indy 500 go cart race is tomorrow, only 100 miles less tedious than the NASCAR Coca-Cola 600 later Sunday night. And many will watch all 1100 miles. As Paul Harvey would say: "It is not one world."
...The high school graduation ceremony in which Suttle participated at gunpoint in 1977 fit well inside the Peachtree High School Gym with a graduating class of some 400. Once officially released from the gulag, there seemed little reason to voluntarily return. Regardless, what's with the arena venues to commemorate a dubious distinction at best?
...Slowly they recovered...hack by hack...drip by drip...
May 26, 2005
...With histamine production still greater than the average bear, Suttle World no longer finds itself looking for the license plate of the truck that ran it over before the onset of the current crud some 48 hours ago.
...Talk about home ice advantage. Try 4336 miles---the distance between our home town Gladiators and the Alaska Ace who are currently battling in a best of seven game series for the coveted Kelly Cup as champions of the EAST Coast Hockey League. The Glads find themselves down 2-0 and return on a rather long bus ride to the Arena at Gwinnett for game 3 Memorial Day afternoon. Silly? Yes, but its minor league hockey for God's sake.
...Very encouraging to see the massive turn out for the Fair Tax rally Wednesday night here in the ATL. Held at the Gwinnett Convention Center, all 4500 seats were filled and at least an equal number were turned away. Could a grass roots movement really slay the dragon that is the most stupid tax code in the history of the free world? Opponents either want to punish achievement, retard economic growth or don't understand what its all about.
....Huge news---bumping around the internet yesterday revealed that the ATL will be graced by a performance by the Dickies Saturday night at the Star Bar in Little Five Points. That's right boys and girls---the Dickies, as in You Drive Me Ape You Big Gorilla and other genius works. This is indeed a rare opportunity to see the aging punk rockers for those of us east of the Mississippi. At $20 a head, Pete Best and Cruis-O-Matic is looking a bit less attractive, especially if one has no interest in seeing Pete Best. The venue is Smithes Old Bar, who's web site lists past performers, including Bowie. Exactly when did that happen?
May 25, 2006
...Called in sick.
May 24, 2006
...Just three days left for nephew Ridge in the 2005-6 academic year. One down, three to go in secondary education department.
...A couple of decent series in the NBA conference finals, now that its time to actually pay some attention to what's happening on the hard court. One the ice, Carolina/Buffalo and Anaheim/Edmonton is tough to get excited about. Wake me for the finals.
...The gentle surfer who thinks its a no brainer for the FBI to raid the offices of Rep. William Jefferson (D-LA), is reminded of the separation of powers. Consider if you will a White House appalled by what it believes to be a horrific Supreme Court decision about to be decided and surrounds the building with Federal Marshals to prevent to Court from meeting. Would that disturb you at all? Suttle World is not toting Jefferson's water here (dude is as guilty as OJ), just reminding folks that this is tricky ground to navigate and should be done so in a very deliberate manner.
...
tonight at the Gwinnett Convention Center.
Be there, or continue to be subjected to 32,000
pages of a tyrannical tax code that punishes achievement
and generally screws with every nook and cranny of
American life.
May 23, 2006
...Memo to the great beyond: fuck you, you cowardly bastard. Actually its no big deal. One cannot miss something one never had, and given that I never had anything, perhaps things merely remain status quo. And for the record my only quarrel is with the cowardly bastard.
...The hideous travel contagion has infected Yo, interrupting the remainder of her time off this week. We hope for a speedy recovery from the mega cold like symptoms that have set in. New York City really does have it all---microscopic and otherwise.
...Discussions continue as to when and where to get the Suttle World Senators back into action and improve on their 0-1 record to date in Wiffle Atlanta. Details forthcoming.
...Even more tedious than Barry Bonds is all the talk as to whether I should care about #714 or not. Roid raged asshole that he is, Bonds did win 4 MVPs prior to any juicing allegations. He is without a doubt a Hall of Famer and one of the greatest left handed hitters in the history of the game. He also can't throw out March of Dimes poster child, Sid Bream, from deep short.
...Got a chance to see the latest pics of now three year old Jake Manitoba, but forgot to remind dad that the kid is now named (Jake Koufax Manitoba) for the greatest living left handed pitcher of all time, now that Warren Spahn has left us. Alas, there's always next time.
...Announced during our absence was an upcoming Cruis-O-Matic gig. The boys will play Smith's Olde Bar July 31---warming up for none other than Pete Best. That nails down our summer music itinerary. Rubber City Rebels next month at the Star Bar, the aforementioned Cruis-O-Matic/Best gig in July and the Brain Surgeons at Underground in August. Pretty damn good for the bush league town that is the ATL. Speaking of the Brain Surgeons, our brief chat with JP at the Joey show revealed that Albert Bouchard was more than willing to work with the Thundrebolt to "borrow" Ross for some Euro gigs later this summer. Works for me as long as it doesn't interfere with the August show here. Ross also indicated he had some Man-O-War (spare me) gigs set for Moscow, etc... this summer.
May 22, 2006
...The spirit was willing, but the dial up connection dreadfully slow, so the promised weekend updates proved too tedious to complete. Suffice to say all made it back from the Big Apple in good stead yesterday evening following a romping good time. The Joey bash was unremarkable in and of itself, but it was fun and especially pleasing to see the Lanza's for the first time since they exchanged vows a year ago last fall. Also most enjoyable was the chance to see The Dictators for the first time in quite a while, albeit in different locations, with only Shernoff making an appearance at the Joey show. JP made it by Irving Plaza to say howdy, and having found Shernoff in the lobby during the show led to his appearance in our locale to lend his most gracious self in a 10-15 minute chat before he headed backstage. We didn't make it to the bitter end because of a call Yo got from Ross the Boss, who explained he was at Manitoba's at the time, but had to leave shortly and hoped we could get by before he left. So leave in a cab we did to Avenue B only to get out to the chants of "Jihad! Jihad! Jihad!" as Manitoba and Ross stood on the sidewalk chatting when we arrived. The most flattering salutation was followed by several hours of story swapping and Dictators intell. We departed around 4:00, trudging up 2nd Avenue to the first all night diner and then a cab ride with time to spare to take the first train to Scarsdale at 5:35 Saturday morning. Suttle World trusts the gentle surfer's Friday evening went well too. More details to follow.
...Still weary and
with a lot of catch up to do now once again
settled into stately Roberts/Suttle Manor, so more
details shall have to wait until later. As a
welcome back bonus, please avail yourself to the
latest installment of 
May 19, 2006
...Car, subway, airport train, plane, shuttle bus to Grand Central, real train and cab for a 9 hour trip to our destination in Scarsdale completed. The somewhat grueling schedule left everyone content to order in pizza and call it an early evening before heading back onto the magical mystical island they call Manhattan later today. Aside from the Joey Bash this evening, there are no definite plans other than the usual tourist stuff. A dial up connect makes for slow going, so further updates as warranted.
May 18, 2006
..."Well, the kids are all hopped up and ready to go...cause New York City really has it all." Yes, they're off this morning after a few last minute errands en route to the Joey Birthday Bash and sundry fun in the Big Apple. Slight change in plans, as the crew now shifts its northeastern headquarters to Scarsdale, NY and a co-op in same courtesy of Yolanda's employer's most generous offerings for the seldom used flat at a much better rate than the Residence Inn at Newark---FREE. So now a chance to check out the Metro North Railroad. We'll be sure to say howdy should we run into Rob Petry.
May 17, 2006
...Let's see: pack, print boarding passes, pick up teeth--all items on today's to do list prior to Thursday's departure for NYC. Yes, the Joey Ramone Birthday Bash extravaganza is nearly underway---with arrival scheduled at LaGuardia tomorrow at around 5:30. Suttle World will attempt to continue publishing during the sojourn. Look for daily updates coming soon to a browser near you.
May 16, 2006
...Didn't get chance to hear the President last night, but it appears as though there was an attempt to kiss most everyone's ass without proposing anything of real substance. However, Suttle World reserves the right to extend and revise its remarks after reviewing the transcript.
...Back to the good Doctor Harvey this morning for the dreaded "major alignment" promised when the store bought teeth episode began nearly a year ago. This is a quaint way of saying that my teeth will be in the possession of a local laboratory for the next 24+ hours during which time Suttle's head will be emptier than usual. One can only hope said alignment will be executed properly given the wearer of same will be 1000 miles to the northeast the day after retrieving the choppers. Martha Rae would be proud.
...Late update....Braves 9 Senators 8 in opening day action from Wiffle Atlanta. Tough break for opening day starter Jon Yardley who went the distance, but was undone by some late defensive lapses that allowed for the Braves bottom of the sixth walk-off win.
May 14, 2006
...The Suttle World Senators are pleased to announce that Jon Yardley will get the opening day start for the Classic Village ball club that looks to represent perhaps a bit better than anticipated by others in the Wiffle Atlanta crowd. If its Wiffle Sunday there, or course, must be rain involved, but today's showers should prove to be of little threat with the weather expected to improve as the afternoon progresses.
...Suttle World extends its most heartfelt happy Mother's Day greetings to all your mothers out there. As we mosey down the timeline of life, perhaps its time to dust off the age old PSA with a twist: "Its 10:00. Do your parents know where they are?"
May 13, 2006
...First full intra squad workout this morning for the Suttle World Senators with a postponed opening day set for tomorrow. Skipper Suttle has yet to announce an opening day starter, requiring a deeper look into the talent pool and a study of the charts and graphs that make up the rules regarding who can pitch when, where and how.
...For a fellow who has spent a fair amount of his career hurt or in the bullpen, John Smoltz's 51st complete game last night is fairly impressive.
...Is it only Suttle World who notes that the four remaining teams in the Stanley Cup Eastern Conference are the #1-4 seeds while the west is #5-8? While on the ice, the Gwinnett Gladiators beat Toledo last night and lead the ECHL Eastern Conference Finals 2 games to 1.
May 12, 2006
...Braves win. Mets lose. Atlanta trails by 7 games.
...Yesterday marked the tenth anniversary of the Value Jet aircraft auguring into the Everglades. 110 were killed.
...If Barbaro has a lock on the triple crown, why did he go off at 6:1 in the Derby?
May 11, 2006
...Diminished by some hideous contagion, Suttle World drags itself back into publication this morning, albeit in a non-robust manner.
...In the breaking news department, comes word of the untimely break up of MC5 bassist Michael Davis who was involved in a serious motorcycle accident in California earlier this week. Davis is hospitalized and expected to make a full recovery, but the misfortune has forced cancellation of the NKT/MC5 appearances in Brooklyn May 18 and at the Joey Ramone BD Bash the following evening. Undeterred by the tragedy, Suttle World's fearsome foursome is still prepared to take Manhattan by storm one week hence.
...In Wiffle news, the Suttle World Senators have an intra-squad workout set for Saturday morning with the rain delayed opening day expected to be played Sunday---time and place TBD.
May 9, 2006
...As linked from today's home page, your Gwinnett Gladiators are now tied at one game each in the best of 7 American Conference championship series of this year's ECHL Kelly Cup campaign. Props to cuzin Bill for the kind invite to attend last night's contest, but still a bit weary for a late night (after 9:00) outing.
...Suttle World Senators intra-squad workout planned for Saturday morning, with a retake of opening day now seemingly being reassembled for this coming Sunday. Details to follow.
May 8, 2006
...And today the final in microbiology. NYC 10 days and counting.
May 7, 2006
...Excepting for my own bumbling, everything came off without a hitch yesterday, and my father was committed to the ground---resting next to his parents, along Lake James in suburban Nebo, NC. Our family extends its most heartfelt appreciation to the many who were kind enough to attend the services Saturday. Some may wish for a more ornate send off, and others none at all, but it is difficult to imagine that anyone could be more pleased with leaving this life so highly thought of by so many people from so many diverse walks of life.
...Suttle World now resumes regular programming---well maybe in a day or so.
May 6, 2006
...We say our final good bys to Dad this afternoon in Nebo.
May 4, 2006
...The outpouring of kind thoughts and words from friends and family over the past couple of days has truly been overwhelming. As the gentle surfer is no doubt aware, my father, Bill Suttle, died Tuesday afternoon. Numerous very high dose rounds of chemotherapy endured over the past year left Dad unable to fight off the onset of pneumonia. Services are planned for Saturday afternoon in Nebo (McDowell County), NC. The obituary that appears in numerous newspapers around the state today:
Bill Suttle
Marion - William W. "Bill" Suttle, resident of Chapel Hill, died Tuesday afternoon, May 2, 2006, in Duke University Medical Center.
A native of Marion, Bill was the son of the late Edgar Wayne and Ruth Kincaid Suttle. A retired lawyer, he graduated from law school at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. Bill was president of the U.S. Jaycees from 1966 to 1967. He had lived in Chapel Hill since 1989.
Surviving are his wife, Mrs. Mary Denton Suttle; sons, Gene Suttle of Atlanta and John Suttle of Charleston, S.C.; and their families.
The funeral service will be held at 2 p.m. Saturday at Nebo United Methodist Church with the Rev. Nancy Kroll officiating.
Burial will be in the church cemetery.
The family will receive friends at the church one hour prior to the service.
In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to Adult Bone Marrow Assistance Program, P.O. Box 3961, Duke Medical Center, Durham, NC 27710 or Nebo United Methodist Church, 117 Schoolhouse Road, Nebo, NC 28761.
Westmoreland Funeral Home is assisting the Suttle family with arrangements in Marion. Arrangements in Durham are by Howerton & Bryan Funereal Home.
An online register is available under "Obituaries" at www.westmorelandfuneralhome.com.
Published: 2006-05-04
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